Inattentive Contretemps
by Jiffie
Summary: Wonka purposely picked five certain children with five certain attribute. That idea was struck down when Mike and Charlie came into the picture. Who were the two children? and what if Wonka made a way for them to join the factory tour? Lolita ChildXAdult.
1. I must find a hair

Inattentive Contretemps

**Author Note:** _(Wow this had a lot of misspelling and such, sorry about that, I lost my subscription to word when I was writing this, and the spell check stopped working, so a lot of sleep deprived work didn't get assistance. Fear not, I have a new writing program, and will be able to be 99.99 percent misspell free)_

Hi *Wave* so, in what I saw in a lot of stories and, I'm assuming (can never remember), the book and/or movie said; its been fifteen years since the chocolate factory was closed down (I don't know if it's fifteen years from when the movie started or when Wonka began to sell his candies again) so that's what I'm going on in this story. I also want to put that I don't really know and wont even _try_ to put down Wonka's age, I'm assuming he's somewhere in his thirties (either late or early) because that's (somewhere about) Johnny Depp's age when he played him (_usually_ actors' characters are close to or similar in age) or he's probably early forty based on the fact that they might want to portray him as old for fretting about getting an heir (Based on Mel Stuart) yet still keep him 'young'—hey, if your forty, your old *Run from my mother and her swinging wooden spoon*. Anyways, I assume that Wonka started his business when he was 17-19 (whatever is a legal adult age in England)—why so early is because he was abandon at, what, _ten_? (Hell, he had to hurry up and get a job once the [hopefully] orphanage he lived in kicked his crazy candy loving ass out)and that he either closed it down when he was (now I'm really just throwing numbers out there) twenty, twenty-two…-_ish_. So in my story that'll make him late thirty-_some'n_ or early forty—but don't you go thinking that, I'm just _assuming_.

**Shout out:** Many thanks to **Jessai'e**, **Nightcrawlerlover**, **Revolution-Roullette**, and **Your** **Worshipfulness** for reviewing my one-shot (which is an extension to this) and accepting this story and not running in horror by it's deliciously forbidden-ness. If it weren't for them, I would have coward in a corner and never released it. (Or just not care what you think and released it anyways. _But don't tell them that, I want them to feel special_) _Kuuuu_-that's one of my happy noise.

**Warning:** Old people, humiliation of said old person, envy of a clipboard, and _creepiness_. Please contact your physical adviser before reading this fic, _thank yoooou_.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it people, I just own my made up meaning of the story and the characters you know weren't in the books or movies. Johnny Depp Wonka (He sometimes roleplay him for me _squoo_-another happy noise)

**Summery:** five golden ticket winners—Mr. Augustus Gloop, Miss Veruca Salt, Miss Violet Beauregarde, Mr. Mike Teavee, and Mr. Charlie Bucket; all lucky winners of the little golden prize. Willy Wonka, the king of artifice, the master of disorientation, and obviously the creator of agitation and ingenuity. The deck was always dealt in his favor… _except_ for the last two. Wonka purposely picked five certain children with five certain attributes—that idea was struck down when Mike and Charlie came into the picture. Who were the two children Wonka _meant_ to receive the golden tickets? And what if Wonka made a way for them to join the factory tour, with or without a golden ticket?

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**Chapter one:** I must find a hair.

"_I'm the girl who's gonna win the special prize at the end."—"Well, you do seem confident and __**confidence is key.**__"_

"_I'm Augustus Gloop. I love your shocolate." — "I can see that. __**So do I**__. I never _expected_ to have so much in common."_

"You_, you're Mike Teavee. You're the little devil who __**cracked **__the system."—"And _you_… well, you're just __**lucky**__ to be here, aren't you?"_

"_Why would Augustus' __**name **__already be in the Oompa Loompa __**song**__-?"—"-__Improvisation is parlor trick, __**anyone can do it**__."_

_Why did Willy Wonka have a problem with Mike hacking to win the golden ticket when Veruca bought her whole state's supply of Wonka bars? Why was Charlie the only 'lucky to be here' child when he found the golden ticket 'like everyone else'? And how did the Oompa Loompas know _what_ song to sing, _when_ to sing, and _who_ to sing about? The answer is not money, poverty, or improvised parlor tricks, all the answers point to Willy Wonka. Willy Wonka knew what children to send the golden tickets to; he wouldn't just allow _anyone_ into his factory, after all._

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Little hands massaged fiercely at what's seemed to be a mound of bubbles; the hands belonged to tiny men that went by the name of Oompa-Loompas. Two Oompa-Loompas massaged the bubbles as two others poured mounds of shampoo into the overflowing mix. Once the four was done, they cleared as a fifth Oompa-Loompa came in with a huge blue and red shower hose and turned it on full blast. The bubbles dissolved to nothing but sudsy watered scum, under the silken layer of water was soaked cordovan tendrils; which bounced each time droplets of water dripped from them.

Willy Wonka brushed the strands of hair that stuck to his face; the Ooompa-Loompa put away the enormous hose and pulled out a similar white one. The four Oompa-Loompas' pulled out combs as the hose began to blow dry at the set temperature of air from its nozzle. Combing the hair with the same persistence as when they were washing, the Oompa-Loompas continued until it was slick and straight. Turning the hose off, the Oompa-loompa jumped off the stool to put it away.

The combing Oompa-Loompas bowed and left while one Oompa-Loompa stayed as he pulled out a bottle of hair gel. The Oompa-Loompa stood back on the stool and began to gently massage the gel into Wonka's locks. After his hair was silk and shiny, the Oompa-Loompa began to trim and even the tips of his hair. Now with even leveled hair, the Oompa-loompa began to curl the ends; when the hair was parted to curl the final piece, the Oompa-Loompa jumped slightly, a gray hair! Wonka looked back, thinking the poor Oompa-Loompa burned himself; the Ooompa-loompa grabbed the side of his head to stop him from turning around. Wonka mouth an 'oookay' as he settled in his seat, the Oompa-Loompa heaved a silent sigh as he reached for the scissors he placed on the table; singling the gray hair out, the Oompa-Loompa snipped it off, he then proceeded on combing his hair.

The Oompa-Loompa dusted his hands off and Wonka lifted a hand mirror. Wonka smiled as he looked at himself to see his newly refined pageboy cut; his look turned into a puzzled one as he saw one extra long strand of hair on his shoulder. Pinching his forefinger and thumb together, Wonka grabbed the hair to get a better look; as the hair came closer to his eyes, his lip raised slightly in disgust. The Oompa-Loompa stayed silent as he watched for a reaction; Wonka's face went blank as a cloudy mist flash through his violet eyes. The Oompa-Loompa stared questionably as his client showed signs of distress.

"I must find an 'hair'." Wonka whispered as he stared at his silent symbol of age.

Wonka stood and gave a small bow, the Oompa-Loompa returned it; checking off Wonka's name on a clipboard. Still holding the hair, Wonka stalked off out of the room. Steadily glowering at the hair, Wonka stepped into the elevator as he automatically pushing a button that read 'shrink—and not the small kind!' The elevator rushed up and zoomed to the left, slings to the right, and dived down diagonally into a comfy looking white room. The elevator doors open and Wonka stepped out; he continued to stare at the hair as he walked over to the psychologist couch and stiffly lay back on it.

The psychologist Oompa-Loompa walked over from his desk to hop in his chair, and pulled out a clipboard and pen. Minutes past, Wonka laid there grimly staring at the hair in his fingers and the shrink silently tapping on the clipboard, occasionally scribbling down unknowns. Wonka's mouth would slightly open, but no words would come out. The Oompa-Loompa shifted slightly and hopped off the chair, he then walked over to Wonka and pried the hair from his fingers. He then began to inspect it; the Oompa-Loompa looked at Wonka and nodded, he then handed it back to Wonka and wrote more unknowns down.

"You're saying that I need a doctor for this?" Wonka state more then asked. The Oompa-Loompa looked over at him, nodded, and then began to write in his clipboard.

"But I don't like doctors…-" Wonka started; the Oompa-Loompa raised an eyebrow.

"-… Not that I don't _like_ doctors, I just don't like _doctors…-_" Wonka tried to explain; the Oompa-Loompa's eyebrow was still raised.

"-… it's just… it's the whole idea of..." Wonka balks. The shrink nodded and began to scribble on his clipboard again.

"Your right… to face this… I'll need medical, not mental treatment, because age is a mental not a medical issue!" Wonka announced as he once again fixated his attention to the hair.

Walking off, Wonka step in to the elevator. The Oompa-Loompa watched him as the glass doors began to close—Wonka stuffed his cane through the doors before they closed all the way; causing the doors to slide back open.

"Thanks, you're a genius!" Wonka added, letting the door slide; the Oompa-Loompa still watched.

"Oh!" Wonka stopped the door again.

"Strike that, reverse it!" Wonka quickly retracted his cane as the doors forcefully closed. The Oompa-Loompa smiled and shrugged modestly as the elevator lifted and shot off out of the room.

The elevator zipped past a huge room with metal pillars stretching from wall to wall; other then that, it was virtually empty. Wonka stopped the elevator and slowly glided back towards the useless room. Drawing his attention from the hair and looking around, Wonka shrugged.

"I should put something in here someday." The elevator lurched, going back to its fast pace.

Eventually the elevator stopped at a cream room that was designed as a waiting room. When the elevator landed, Wonka stepped from the elevator; still focused on the hair. He walked to the booth where a female Oompa-Loompa looked up from her scribbling on her clipboard to greet him; she smile and pointed to some chairs, not looking, Wonka slunk to one of the chairs rested on the walls and sat down. A few minutes went and the door opened to show another female Oompa-Loompa cradling a wailing baby, Wonka looked up and cringe; either from fear of what caused the baby to sob so fierce or from disgust by the baby itself.

An Oompa-Loompa dressed in a nurse's suit walked out behind them, looking at her clipboard, the nurse wave Wonka over and walked back through the doors. Wonka stood, keeping an eye on the Oompa-Loompa and the hair, while following behind. The Oompa-Loompa stopped to open a door, holding it open for Wonka to enter before coming in there herself. Wonka looked around the room; a room that greatly resembled a pediatrician's.

"So…" Wonka started, the Oompa-Loompa looked up and frowned; turning the clipboard towards him and tapping it. It read '**Last Appointment: **_**Thirteen**__**years**_** ago' **in bold red letters.

"Oh… heh, _that_." Wonka nervously laughed, switching from her to his hair so he wouldn't have to make eye contact.

The Oompa-Loompa shook her head and tsked. She then grabbed his hand and pulled him towards a measuring stick that was glued to the wall and looked like a cute long neck goose with a onesie on; it only went to four feet and on the side read 'Children and or Oompa-Loompas', the Oompa-Loompa frowned. She pulled him back and took him to the other wall, which too had a measuring stick; instead this one was a giraffe that wore a business suit and it's neck bent awkwardly at the ceiling to try and stay in the room, the side read 'old people' Wonka frowned.

Reluctantly being measured, Wonka was guided to two scales; one had little feet, the other had big feet. One read 'old people' and the other 'Children and or Oompa-Loompas', Wonka frowned as he was pushed onto the one that said 'Old people'. After the Oompa-Loompa read his weight, she sat him down on the bed table. She then pulled out a shelf that had two of every thing in it, one was big and the other small. Wonka glowered as he knew he was going to be treated with the things that read 'Old people'.

"Heh… What I really need you to look at is this." Wonka said nervously as he showed her the gray strand.

She paused and stared at the hair, she ignored him and pulled out a thermometer. After his temperature was taken and his arm squeezed half to death, the Oompa-Loompa nurse checked a few things on her clipboard and then left the room. A minute later, another Oompa-Loompa came in; this one was male and wore a doctor's coat. Wonka looked up from the hair and thrust it forward, the Oompa-Loompa flipped threw his clipboard and put it aside to take the hair from him. The doctor studied the hair; jiggling it to see if it were loose or stiff, tugging it to see if it was strong or weak, rubbing it—the Oompa-Loompa doctor looked shocked and looked over to Wonka—who just smiled and nodded; the hair was _silky_ smooth.

The Doctor's smile fell when he looked at the hair up in the light. Wonka frowned when he saw the doctor shake his head and scribble something on his clipboard, flipping it over it read '**You're **_**old**_'-'

"Am not!" Wonka shouted as he stood up. The doctor shook his head.

"I'm not in denial either." Wonka said crossing his arms. The doctor shook his head and handed the hair back to him. Wonka stared down at it sadly; he then chucked the hair in a waste basket.

"So… _How long do I have_." Wonka asked dramatically. The doctor jumped and began to fiercely make various hand signs, pointing to Wonka's age on his clipboard.

"Oh! Okay then." Wonka quickly cheered up.

"Ya see, I thought this whole g-g…g-g-g_uuuu_…" Wonka balked. "… _Silver_ hair-thing was the end of me, heh, can you believe it." Wonka regained himself, laughing with glee; the doctor joined him. With a whole new air of confidence, Wonka lounged on the bed.

"And here I was, thinking _I_ needed an _heir_, ha!" Wonka laughed. The doctor stopped and stared; Wonka looked over to him to see why he stopped laughing.

"Y-you think I need an heir…?" Wonka asked; the doctor grimace but nodded. Wonka stared at the ceiling for a long time; the doctor stared at him sympathetically.

"… H-…h-how would I even _get_ one?" Wonka asked to no one in particular. The doctor looked over and made a head gesture at a picture of a pregnant Oompa-Loompa female; Wonka followed his gaze.

"Oh… Taking care of the candies is enough, I mean, no offense but the last time I let one of you Oompa-Loompa make a candy, _whew heh_,_ it wasn't too good_,_ let me tell you_-" The doctor raised an eyebrow, not convinced

"_Oooh_… you mean… _me go and_… with uh… _Oookaay_, no, _ew_." Wonka shuddered.

"-Cutting a baby out of an Oompa-Loompa's stomach and genetically altering it's genes so it can make good chocolate ._sick_, and I wont support any of it." The doctor gave an jaded sigh.

"Or-… wait or-or…!" Wonka sat up getting an idea.

"Or! I could get a child from _out there_!" He and the doctor stared at a blank wall, as if there were a window there.

"But then what if the child tells my secrets…" Wonka enthusiasm died down as he thought about it. Wonka then stared blankly at the doctor.

"… It won't be able to… because it will be _my_ heir, it won't even leave the factory!" Wonka stood from the bed. He then walked over and shook the Oompa-Loompa doctor's hand.

"Thank you! Thank you!" Wonka let go of the doctor's hand.

"Ya know, you should be a therapist." picking up his cane, he then looked for his hat; it wasn't here! Through the whole silver hair-thing, Wonka didn't even put back on his hat!

Wonka stopped "How old should it be? Should she be young?—like five; five's a good age, or should he be old; like sixteen?" Wonka began to count on his shiny gloved fingers.

"Well, I gotta get go'n! So little do, and so much to time! Reverse that, Strike it—no wait, that's just violent… Reversely strike that!" Wonka stalked off, he didn't have time to correct himself.

Rushing to get to the elevator, Wonka 'almost' tripped over an Oompa-Loompa that was tinted blue. The Oompa-Loompa at the desk waved as he sped past her. He didn't even have time to wave at the female Oompa-Loompa as he hopped into the elevator.

"I'm going to have a baby!"

_**Break**_

Wonka retrieved his hat from the barber and was now sitting in his office; two other Oompa-Loompas were there with him. Wonka was flicking threw millions of children from the ages 4-17 on a large computer screen, while the Oompa-Loompas searched through gigantic books—writing down the kids they choose in a clipboard; where these books' of 'all the children in the world' came from—Willy didn't even know. Wonka was skimming through the 'A's in an unnaturally fast pace while his eyes were somehow able to perusal every last picture and description.

"Ah! Heh, here's one I like: eats chocolate, breathes chocolate, love chocolate, and he has a picture to prove it." Wonka said, stopping and enlarging a picture of a kid by the name of Augustus Gloop.

"He'd do _anything_ for chocolate!" Wonka said with starry eyes.

"…Plus he lives in Düsseldorf Germany, town… of _Gaststätte Düsselheim_! —Welp, I like everything about him." Wonka read the boy description, picking his heir on the spot.

The Oompa-Loompas stop their riffling through the books and looked up; they exchanged looks then sending it to Wonka, who stared back offended

"What? Is the love of chocolate not _enough_?" Wonka was appalled. One of the Oompa-Loompas gave a hand gesture, the other nodded in agreement. They were referring to their list of children they had on their clipboards.

"Why do _all_ of you have one of **those**? I want one…" Wonka said absent mindlessly as he silently read off some of the children they had listed. Flipping the clipboard down, Wonka huffed.

"Fine, maybe I should '_add more_-" Wonka quoted. "-before I choose'." Turning back around, Wonka saved and pushed the 'biography: Augustus Gloop' to the side and began to search for more kids.

Wonka found two other kids that were in the same age range, Veruca Salt and Violet Beauregarde. He stopped near the 'X', it may seem really close to 'Z' but in reality, there were actually 2.5 thousand and _some_ _**pages**_ left and Wonka didn't have the patients or the attention span to go through the rest; three was enough right? Minimizing the screen and pushing the computer over and off his desk—shattering on contact, he then turned to the Oompa-Loompas.

"I have three." Wonka said competitively. The Oompa-Loompas didn't look impressed; not to push the matter forward, they gave him their clipboard and waited as he looked them over—there was over twenty children on there.

"Don't like this one… That ones' not so good… Her face looks funny…-" Wonka was just crossing off names left and right. The Oompa-Loompas glanced at each other, not one was going to mention the names and appearance of the children _Wonka_ picked.

"-…And he's too old." Wonka finished, slopping his red 'WW' emblem marker across the child's picture.

The Oompa-Loompas quickly picked up the second clipboard as Wonka went for it. Wonka looked slightly offended as they protectively held it out of his grasp. They then quickly looked over it and circled the two children they particularly liked. Quickly slipping the clipboard from them, Wonka looked the names over; one was male and the other female. Wonka really didn't care to take much notice in their detail and picture; he just read what properties they could bring to the factory.

"Okay." Wonka smiled, flipping the clipboard on the desk. The Oompa-loompa's smiled.

"Now which one; my personal favorite is the little Düsseldorf boy… Well he's not exactly little… he _is_ little, just not _little_…-" Wonka rambled as he tried to correct himself.

The Oompa-Loompas stopped his rambling by exchanging hand gestures. Wonka watched as they had a little conversation between each other, feeling a little left out; Wonka began to doodle the name's he choose next to the ones the Oompa-Loompa choose. Turning back towards him, the Oompa-Loompas then shared their ideas; Wonka's face hardened.

"That'll mean I'll have to bring all five into my factory…" Wonka sat straight, not liking their idea at all; the Oompa-Loompas were persistent.

"How could I trust children, when adults—the mature ones—were the cause of me closing the factory." Wonka said seriously. The Oompa-Loompas looked at him knowingly

"… That's just it… isn't it?" Wonka stopped his forming flashback.

"The adults were _mature_… They can't understand candy because your not suppose to!" The Oompa-Loompas smiled, Wonka mirrored them and stood.

"… I still pick the German boy." Wonka added after their laughing fest was over.

One Oompa-Loompa did a hand gesture as he pointed to the kids they choose. Wonka and the other Oompa-Loompa looked down at the clipboard; he was pointing to their deficient side of them. Each one had something that would clash with Wonka's ideal heir.

"Hmm… That's going to be a problem, isn't it?" Wonka said as he read their quirks; the Oompa-Loompa nodded in agreement.

"Well, their not _too_ bad…" The Oompa-Loompas didn't look too convinced.

"… _Heh_… we'll just have to test them." Wonka added when he saw that the Oompa-Loompas didn't agree.

Gathering his cane, Wonka walked from his desk—making sure to step over the shattered, yet oddly still on and working, computer he pushed off from his desk. Stepping into his glass elevator, that he had patiently waiting for him, Wonka stood and waited.

"Well come on, I can't do this by myself." Wonka called to the two Oompa-Loompas who both exchanged looks and stood to join him.

_**Break**_

"Have you all practiced?" The many Oompa-Loompas nodded.

"Okay good. Now all I need is a greeting… it has to be something _good_…" Wonka stopped to think. An Oompa-Loompa Raised his hand, Wonka gladly pointed to him. "Yes, you?"

The Oompa-Loompa stood and did a dancing motion. Wonka looked interested and nodded as if he was actually talking. "Uh-huh, no; way too sticky, next!" The Oompa-Loompa frowned but sat down.

Another raised its hand; he stood and pretends to play a flute, dancing around and everything. "Heh, cute, but then where would the tigers go after the tour? Another?" This went on for about an hour until all the Oompa-Loompa's where bored.

"Well? We need something!" Wonka said, watching as the Oompa-Loompas' eyes began to stray, and no more hand's raised. "Fine, fine." Wonka stood from the crowd of over worked Oompa-Loompas, looking around, he frowned.

This was that empty room again, he decided to make it a conference room, but he really wasn't digging it. The room just didn't have the feel to it, looking around; he saw that all the little Oompa-Loompas have left. Sighing, Wonka walked over to his glass elevator, reaching his arm out, he notice that it wasn't in the spot he left it in, well, the spot he _thinks_ he left it in; he never really could ever find that thi-… Wonka quickly jumped up from the ground and looked around, no one saw. Fixing his hat and jacket, Wonka then opened the doors and stood in it.

What he really needed where some down time. Pressing the 'Television Room' button, Wonka was lifted and propelled up and out of the dull blank room. Landing softly, Wonka stepped out of the elevator, he walked through the doors, pulling down his own unique pair of shades. In the Television Room, Wonka sat on a big white comfy bean bag chair and picked up an overly large remote; clicking the only button on the remote, Wonka blinked, nothing happened.

Two Oompa-Loompas walked towards Wonka, and informed him that the television was currently under repairs. Wonka, appalled, suggested that the two find something that could be entertaining. Thinking for a while, the Oompa-Loopmas began to act out a scene of some sort; Wonka didn't really know. He stared at them with a confused face. The Oompa-Loompas left and came back with two hand puppets; one was Wonka himself and the other was a female of some sort, they then began to act the scene again.

Wonka still had a look of confusion, until he saw the puppet Willy and the female began to furiously, and quite drolly, kiss each other. Wonka's eyes widen and quickly separated the glued puppets. Holding each puppet separately in different hands, Wonka glared down at the laughing Oompa-Loompas. The Oompa-Loompas straighten up, but both raised an eyebrow.

"What was that supposed to mean?" Wonka asked, but he knew what they were hinting at.

The Oompa-Loomaps gesture confirmed this. Wonka's face blanked, as if in a daze, the Oompa-Loompas glanced at each other, thinking maybe they might have offended him. Wonka lifted the puppets into view as he gazed at them with a blank stare.

"I think you're on to something…" Wonka mumbled, looking at the two dolls. The Oompa-Loompas shared another glance, they've been doing things like this for ten years, and it now seems like a good idea to him. Both of them shrugged as he pocketed the two dolls.

"**I **have _an_ idea." Wonka voiced, pointing a finger in the air. The Oompa-Loompa's didn't question and followed as he past his elevator and down the hall.

"Need the exercise, ha." Wonka said to the two as the shared odd looks.

"This is going to be great!" Wonka exclaimed as he walked through the doors of the room where he design and create his colorful curtains and wrappings.

"You." He stopped a passing Oompa-Loompa. The Oompa-Loompa blinked as he was handed the two dolls. "I need more of these; bigger, plastic-y-er-" He then took back the Willy doll "-less handsome-" Wanka winked at the doll, and pocketed it again, "-but more… cutesie!" He smiled and the Oompa-Loompa returned it.

"Good, good—I'll be back tomorrow, to see what you have." Wonka turned on his heel and stalked off; leaving the three Oompa-Loompas to stare after in bewilderment.

Wonka left to his study with a smile on his face; he felt so giddy, one week, and he was already more than half way finished with his 'heir' problem. Was he good, or was he good! It's as if everything was kissed by god and placed on his cobblestoned future. Ah, life was good. Wonka felt so great that day; that he even finished all his checks on his factory—life was good.

Willy Wonka walked the halls of his factory with a smile on his face; a jump in his step each time he walked—no—_glided_. Wonka turned and entered through the doors of his craft room to be met with big marbled eyes of twelve puppets. They were bald, missing the top of their heads to be exacted, and a pale sheet of skin pink with no real color definition; other than that, they were fantastic!

"Oh great; your almost done!" Some Oompa-Loompas stopped to gesture while others continued their work without distractions "Good thing I came before you decorated them! Because I gots a few suggestions." Wonka started as the last doll was lined up.

"Now I'm looking for a kind'a… Chef, slash baker, slash muffin man, slash…-" And Wonka continued.

The day went by in a breeze, actually, all of Wonka's days go by without a hitch; minus the nagging nuisance of responsibilities and dependance, life would seem to go by in a breeze. However, something felt good about this; no, not the thought of opening his factory to a bunch of children that needs to learn to keep their grubby little hands to themselves, but the feeling of actually conquering a 'problem' without, well, a problem!

Back into the room with the dolls, a day has passed, and Wonka was happy to see them painted and dressed with the appropriate atire and arranged in the design of his vision. Clapping, Wonka then pulled out a letter from his jacket.

"Now I need my big opening." Wonka said as the Oompa-Loompas worked around to look for and set up what he needed.

Minutes later, two Oompa-Loompas came through with a simple, but elegant, red and gold wooden chair, placing it in the middle. Wonka walked over and sat down, striking a suave pose; one leg lifted, with his ankle resting on the others knee, his hands clasped with his cane hugged under his elbow; a soft, yet very alluring, smile on his face.

"Play it." He ordered. Pulling the lever, the Oompa-Loompas then waited and watched.

There was silence, but the dolls turned and spun as was instructed. At the end, the dolls stopped and closed into their case. The Oompa-Loompas clapped and cheered, half for their work and the other half for actually enjoying it. Wonka lifted from his chair and stared down at the Oompa-Loompas; they all looked up at him, waiting for his judgment.

"I…" The Oompa-Loompas leaned in, "I… couldn't see a thing." Wonka laughed. "Do it again, I'll stand right here." The Oompa-Loompas shook their head and played it again. When finished, Wonka began to clap.

"Fantastic! It's great." Wonka's applause died down. "You know, I think it needs some… _Floosh_!" Wonka exclaimed; making an explosion gesture with his hands. "Something that just, _hn un_." He made more flashing gestures. "Like fire works! Or sparklers!" He stated. Turning he smiled down at the Oompa-Loompas and gestured for them to make it happen.

Hours passed and Wonka was called back into the craft shop; it was fairly easy to get 'explosives' for Wonka's experiment, seeing as he uses them all the time. Standing to watch, Wonka and the Oompa-Loompas waited for the puppets to do their show, once finished, an Oompa-Loompa pressed a button and a spark flared out over the chair; it was mild to where it almost glittered.

"That was…" Wonka started, the Oompa-Loompas leaned in. "Kind of appalling… _very_ lame." Wonka finished, "But more of that, yeah? Just slightly more-" Wonka clamped his hands; the Oompa-Loompas nodded and started over again from scratch.

Rearing the night, Wonka was called back into the room, same routine After the show, the button was pushed and a flare of sparks erupted. Wonka and the Oompa-Loompas jumped as a few dolls set fire. The Oompa-loompas could only watch until the sparks died down. Some Oompa-Loompas sprang forward as they tried to save the melting dolls; the others stared at their candy ruler as he clapped.

"Wow! I can't believe how _great_ that turned out, just like I'd imagined!" Wonka fawned. He then looked over to half the dolls that were damaged in the process.

"Make doubles, tomorrow we'll test run it again—after that; we'll make a little song, and all will be easy peesy." Wonka left the Oompa-Loompas to their work.

A month had passed since Wonka's 'hair' problem, this all was taking longer then he thought; he assumed that he'd have everything done—from the kids coming, to him choosing—then he'd be back to focusing on candy, but all that failed to flop, and he was going to have a creative overload. He notice that he was spending more time in his craft room, he had to move the puppets out when the burnt ones started to pile up, 'to that one room' he told them; miraculously, they understood and found the blank room Wonka referred to. In the craft room, Wonka watched as they stretched and flatten a sheet of gold; evenly cutting out five rectangles, then placing them on a table in front of him. Wonka pulled out a long pen like stick, where he began to hand carve his inscription into the sheets of gold, which would soon be his golden tickets into the factory.

Wonka played around a bit, signature name in different spots of each ticket, a doodle here and a doodle there. When entirely bored with it, Wonka left them for the Oompa-Loompas to give the edges their design. Wonka was met by an Oompa-Loompa in the chocolate bar line up; he was in one of the many rooms were he make his milk chocolate bars. The Oompa-Loompa lifted a gold ticket and Wonka plucked one from his hands; placing the golden sheet over one bar, giving it a gentle pat, Wonka watched as the conveyor belt dragged it off to be wrapped.

"And that's off to Düsseldorf." Wonka mumbled.

"Now, off to the Buckinghamshire bars."

_**

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**_

Five golden tickets; each nicely wrapped in specially hand made candy bars—all by Mr. Wonka himself. Wonka knew each child's pattern, everything from which time they buy it, to which one _they'd_ pick. Yes the store owners would stock the candy bars differently, but the Oompa-Loompas would make sure to arrange them in their rightful place. Hell, let's even add some pizzazz to it and make it seem like a contest. Wonka typed up a flier, announcing his plans of allowing children into his factory; he made sure to make it seem special—how far would the world go to win something that they'd never truly have? Would they kill for it? Wonka would hope not—but it would be entertaining none the less. Right at this very instant, his fliers was being delivered; taped on every pole and store window the Oompa-Loompas could get their gloved hands on. World, let the games begin.

_**

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**_

**Author Note:** I'm not saying this is how everything really happened (Of course I don't know what Roald Dahl was thinking) but I'm relaying the message I got from his story. Now you might see Will Wonka as a playful happy character; just a man whose mind never aged, forever the dreaming child—I do agree—_buuuuut_, I like writing characters with a little bite. I'll turn Barny into a slave owner who forces children to prostitute and make shoes—that's just how I roll. Yes, you can't make a meanie out of everyone, but think about it; do you think Wonka have a bad side? I mean, his father _never_ allowed any candy, his father **moved the joint house** to get away from him (all in one day—the house was freaken attached to the other houses, man), he was brace-_head_ for probably all his life until he was able to remove them (good lord only knows how he managed that), and when he finally make it in the world—his candy dream coming true—the competition doesn't play fair, and steals all his ideas; giving candy a bad name. I think Wonka is scared, he might seem nice; yes he's just a playful child—but I think Wonka still have some issues with people. But no fear! He made up with his father, and have Charlie to help along the way =D. But for now, in later chapters, he'll be a little… perniciously callous… and will be for a while.


	2. Inattentive contretemps

Inattentive Contretemps

**Author Note:** Yup, I was supposed to post this one out too; I'd just felt it would be wrong to leave it at that, no real understanding of what's happening This chapters will be about how the kids ran into the golden tickets—all the way into the sixth child—Charlie isn't really included seeing as the movie was all about _him_. With that said, you should know that you won't meet the two new characters until after everyone else.

**Warning:** Snot nose brats and their tiny, _tiny_ fingers…

**Disclaimer:** I wish I could own (or have some rights to) CATCF, so I can taint the world's children with my own version of WWATCF, evil things would fill the book, _evil things_.

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**Chapter two:** Inattentive contretemps.

**Augustus Gloop**

"_Steady now Augustus, your father is almost done." Mrs. Gloop told her son of two years. Augustus ignored his mother's words as he grabbed for a sausage out of the bin that was made for one of the waiting costumer. "Oh ho, ho. _Augustus_~." His mother laughed as the boy down the sausage instantly._

"Mama! Lookit." Eleven year old Augustus Gloop wobbled over to his mother, holding an excessively large sausage. "Vati lets me all by myself." Mrs. Gloop stood from her primping and took hold of the over weight sausage.

"So good you are, Agustus." His mother doted, handing it back to him.

"Just like Vati!" A voice boomed as Mr. Gloop walked into the dining room. The room erupted with hefty laughter as the father place a pound of meet on the table.

"Wait, wait; what is that?" Mrs. Gloop questioned, snaking out a browned sheet that was on top of the heap of news paper—where the meat was now resting.

"What is it, mama?" Augustus asked, pulling out a chocolate bar.

"Something about that chocolate man… A special prize! Oh, I wonder what it could be!" Mrs. Gloop cheered as her son joined in. "You have to find some ticket in the shocolate bar?" She mumbled and looked over to her son who stared down at his candy bar.

Augustus tore into his Wonka bar, stripping it clean at the top; blank. His parents looked at each other crestfallen; their hopes lifted once the bar was quickly eaten, no hesitation.

"He'll find one." Mr. and Mrs. Gloop smiled as they said this in union.

**Veruca Salt**

"_Look at you~ my precious little princess." Mr. Salt cooed at his newly birth daughter. The newborn yawned and she opened one of her eyes, "Sweetie, sweetie look." Mr. Salt gushed to his wife; who was passed out on her birth bed._

"_**Daddy**_!" Twelve year old Veruca Salt screamed. She stood in her father's office as he tired to converse with one of his nut company's share holders. "_Da__**d**_**dy**! Daddy, daddy, ugh! Listen to me!" Veruca fumed, knocking over his desk lamp.

"I'm sorry, hold for a while; talk to one of our operators" Mr. Salt pressed a button; where his client would most likely be listening to bad elevator music. "Yes, my princess?" Mr. Salt asked his daughter, finally having his full attention.

"Daddy, I want a glass of water." Veruca told, folding her arms to calm herself.

"Someone get my daughter a refreshing glass of water." Mr. Salt said into the intercom at his desk; where a 'yes, Mr. Salt' replied back.

Veruca smiled at her father as he stood and ushered her out of his office. Walking down their luxurious hall way; they were then met by one of the many house keepers who handed Veruca a glass of ice with a lemon on the sided. The house keeper pulled out a bottle of Veen water and poured her a glass; dropping a bendy straw into it. Now at one of the six living rooms, Veruca sat down at the couch where she took a sip of her glass and placed it on one of the dressers; never to be touched by her hands again.

"Daddy; I want a ticket." Veruca started.

"Whatever do you mean, cupcake?" Mr. Salt asked, no idea what she was talking about.

"The kids at my school talks of this 'golden ticket', I want one." Veruca stated; she stood and went over to hug him. "Thank you daddy. I really do need one." She then skipped off to one of her many rooms.

"Gena." Mr. Salt picked up his cell phone.

"_Yes, Mr. Salt_?" A voice replied.

"Make an order out for every _single_ Wonka bar in this state; if any were bought, make sure they don't have a 'golden ticket' in it."

"_Yes, Mr. Salt_."

**Violet Beauregarde**

"_Sweetie, sweetie—smile." Mrs. Beauregarde cheered._

_Though her daughter couldn't hear her, she made up by violently gesturing to her face as she showed her daughter a big grin. Violet was currently balancing on the_ _pommel horse; she swung her body around it as she kept her legs elevated. She then jumped from the pummel horse and stuck her ground; smiling brightly, she furiously chewed her gum._

"Violet? Violet what are you doing?" Mrs. Beauregarde called, walking into their living room.

"I'm rearranging my trophies." Thirteen year old Violet Beauregarde said curtly; after placing her world record holder and junior world champion cup for gum chewing trophy on the middle shelf, she then pulled out a Wonka bar and took a big chunk.

"_Oh my gawd_. Violet! What are you doing?" Her mother asked shocked, going over to her daughter and plucking the bar out of her hands.

"_Mom_, I need that; I've found a new sport." Violet stated taking the candy bar back and finishing it. "I need more actually." She stated.

"But Violet, you-" Violet showed her mother one of the many fliers that was placed all around the city. "_Oh_~." She took the paper and read it. "You think you could win?"

Violet pulled out another bar, took out her world winning chewing gum, stuffed it behind her ear, and downed the candy bar in seconds. "I _know_ I _will_ win."

**Ethan Yavaneh**

"Mum, I'm home. Mum?" Thirteen year old Ethan Yavaneh ran into his tiny joint apartment who he shared with his forty-three year old, unemployed, single mother.

Ethan sighed as he saw his two year old brother sitting on the table, putting tomato sauce in their mother's hair as she snored; she was passed out on the table—again. She held a bottle of gin; which was most likely the cause of her black out.

"Come on, James; it's bed time." James squeal in protested as he chanted his favorite word; no.

Ethan took his time as he bathed James and tucked him in; James made sure to be read to, even though he never understood a word. After about two hours, James was sleep with his lights out and everything. Ethan walked back down the stairs to see his mother still in the same positions as when he first came in.

"You big baby…" Ethan muttered as he lifted his mother over his shoulder and carried her up the stairs.

It wasn't as difficult as it sound; his mother was a small woman, at about five feet; from the lack of food, she weighed 100 pounds exactly. Ethan was a tall boy, taller than his mother, even though his weight also laxed; he had enough muscle to drag his mother around. He sat her down on her spring riddled bed as he took her bourbon and gin covered house coat. She was only left in her cami, but it was better than a filth house coat that hardly warmed anything. Ethan sighed as she fell back onto the bed and squirmed around to reach the head where her flatten 'pillow' lay.

Ethan paused as she opened her green eyes, mirroring his, and gave him a gentle smile; she lifted her hand and placed it on his head. Caressing his red locks, she then slid her hand down to his check where she traced over his dimples. "Thanks, babe…" She whispered tiredly.

"It's okay, mum." Ethan whispered back, grabbing her hand, he caressed it for a second; he took it and placed it under her tattered covers. "Goodnight." She smiled, but didn't reply back as the alcohol drug her back.

"Ethan! The stove, it broke again!" Ethan opened his eyes to see himself still in his dull barren room. His mother was calling for him as his little brother screamed and squealed for unknown reasons.

After using the bathroom, Ethan walked out into their small kitchan"E_than_~! Fix it~." His mother whined.

She was attempting to make broth and was turning the nob to prove that the stove was indeed broken. James was squealing as he opened and closed the refrigerator, demanding to be fed. Ethan sighed; he's been doing that a lot lately. Ever since his dad died, his mom has been turning to him to be Mr. Fix it.

"I don't know what happen. I planned to cook soup, got my pot and everything, poured the broth in; seasoned it, turned the nob—nothing!" His mom started casually as he turned the stove around to see the back of it.

As she rambled about taking the stove back for being a 'piece of crap'; Ethan's mind wondered. Ethan didn't mind fixing things for his mother; on the contrary, he really enjoyed it. He loved to create and repair things. His father was, believe it or not, a repair man; he died repairing a light post and his idiot partner 'forgot' to turn off the power. Before he died, he taught Ethan how to fix anything really—first you have to take it apart; so when it brakes, you'll remember how it looked fixed. Ethan cursed as he saw that the wire was fried.

"Watch that mouth of yours, young man." Ethan looked back as he remembered his mother was behind him.

"We need a new wire." Ethan told her.

It wouldn't be too much of a problem; they weren't poor, just lower class. Ethan's mother was unemployed, but Ethan wasn't; it was illegal for Ethan to work at such a young age, but he was known around town, they knew of his father, and of his work—so they paid him under the table; good thing, no taxes was taken.

"Well, go get us one; you know I never understand you and your father's 'mechanic' mumbo jumbo." Ethan rolled his eyes as his mother wondered off and took out about fifteen dollars from her purse.

"I went through your purse, fifteen dollars…" Ethan mumbled, his mother grunted in responds.

Ethan walked out of the store with a new short wire and eleven dollars and thirty-four cents. Ethan blinked as he saw people crowd around a pole. Walking over, he read it was from Willy Wonka.

"That candy nut…? Special surprise, eh?" Ethan shook his head as he turned around and walked home, "They'd get a surprise alright, after they've spend a million dollars looking for that thing; bet he didn't even post any tickets out—like those cereal boxes." Ethan laughed bitterly as he walked into his home.

"Fixed." Ethan said, turning the stove back around. "Oh, here's your change." Ethan said, digging in his blue jeans and handing her the money and recite.

"Thanks, babe." She kissed his forehead and chucks the money into her purse. "What flavor you want, you chose today." She said, pulling out her broth pot again.

He didn't have the heart to tell her, her broth tasted the same no matter what she threw in it—it wasn't that they didn't buy food, yeah they ran out when there were no extra money, but she just wasn't that good at cooking. "Um, chicken?" He stated.

"Oh good, my favorite too." She stated dully, pulling out a cigarette.

Ethan just put James to bed when he went down stairs to see his mother didn't pass out on the table again; but she was drinking a lot, so she probably made it to her room to pass out.

Ethan went back to his room to undress and take a shower. Digging in his jeans, he pulled out the wire packaged and a stray ten dollar bill. "Must of forgot." He mumbled, he then looked around and pocket it again, shrugging.

"You should see this, Ethan! Come here a second!" Ethan sighed in his bed; at his home again, his dreams was becoming deadly addicting.

Ethan walked down the stairs as he saw James playing with a crayon near a corner; there was nothing on the wall now, but once he left the hall, James would go at it. Ethan stopped into their connected kitchan and living room; he looked to see his mother watching the TV.

"-I'm eating the Wonka bar and I taste something _that is not shocolate_. Or coconut, or walnut, or peanut bootter, or nougat, or bootter brittle, or care-a-mel, or sprinkles; so I look and I find the golden ticket." Ethan blinked as he watched the boy get squeezed between his mother to take a picture.

"You hear this shit?" His mother stated. "That crazy ass Wonka inviting these children to run a muck in his factory for a day; _like fat ass needs more 'shocolate', _feh." His mother stated bitterly. His mother was once a worker at Wonka's factory; two years before he was born. Wonka started selling his candies again, but without workers—rumor was that he was using new robot technologies.

"He was a handsome devil, he was." His mother slurred; she was drunk already, was Wonka getting to her? "What if you find one of them ticket things?" She asked, Ethan looked over at her and thought; robot technologies, eh? He did have a machine in mind, if he could sell it to Wonka, they could be rich!

"I don't know…" Ethan said, though he was slightly smiling.

"You'd leave me, wouldn't you…? Ethan?" Ethan blinked and rolled his eyes "You'd just get up and leave, leave your poor mother."

"Here we go…" Ethan mumbled, walking from the couch to get his coat.

"Ethan! Etha-" Ethan quickly left out the door, making sure he didn't forget his keys.

He knew she'd forget what she was talking about, roam the house, then pass out somewhere. This Wonka thing was already trouble, and he didn't even get a good look at the notice yet. "Whoa…?" Ethan blinked as the candy store was practically being raided. Ethan laughed as he walked passed it into the tech store; that Wonka was a crafty one, he really knew how to rake in the dough—he'd have Hershey and Dove running for their money these next few weeks.

"Hey Ethan, your part shipped in." The store owner said; he then handed him a pale brown box.

"Thanks, Ted." Ethan said, eagerly snatching the box playfully. Ethan smiled broadly as he jogged home.

Ethan didn't stop when he saw his mother passed out on the couch, he even kept going when he saw the whole bottom half of the wall where James sat was green.

"Hah!" He cheered as he went into his closet and pulled out a thick red metal box like contraption.

Ethan pressed a button and the top lifted into a power driver like shape. Ethan lifted a remote and tested it as it twisted and turned; Ethan have been working on this since he was six, it was his dad's projected, they both worked on it together… well, until his father died that is. Well, it was supposed to be a screw driver, so people could automatically screw in anything! It could bend back ways and front ways, any ways! The piece that he ordered from china a month ago was to help the tip turn left and right, to screw and unscrew.

Ethan worked deep into the night, the sun was close to rising, and he was finally able to get the tip to spin without twisting off. Test driving it, Ethan screwed and unscrewed his lamp post, tired Ethan than dragged himself into his bed.

Ethan waited at one of the corner stores; he saw a man in an important looking suit and rushed up to him

"Hey… Um, Mr. Bodinsky, right?" Ethan started.

"Why… yes, can I help you?" The man asked, pulling his face from his wrist watch.

"You see… uh, I'm a carpenter, and I-I notice that some of your screws are loose—which is a health hazard and—and, well… Have you ever felt there could be a better way to screwing the things that needs screwing?" Ethan went for the more questionable approach.

"Yes, it does get a little tedious…?" Ethan smiled. He then walked over to his red machine

"Well sir, look no further."

**Elice Nervada**

"Grandmama?" Eleven year old Elice Nervada called, walking into her grandmother's bedroom.

"In here, dear." The fragile voice of her aging grandmother called out to her.

Elice walked further in and went to the bathroom; her grand mother sat at her vanity, pulling her long white hair into a low pony tail. Elice dropped her orange bookbag onto the floor and ran to hug her grandmother.

"Grandmama, our school is having a carnival; will you come?" Elice started casual conversation.

"Oh my, dear, I don't know… I haven't been feeling well lately." Elice frowned as her grandmother slowly stood and walked out of the bathroom.

"W-well, it's just at the school—and it'll be inside, so you don't have to walk much." Elice said, fiddling with her plaid green skirt. "Maybe you'll feel better when it comes?" Elice hoped, twirling her russet brown hair.

"Maybe, dear." Her grandmother soothed, sitting down on her bed. "But you know what would make me feel better?" Elice smiled as she sat down on the bed.

"Chocolate!" Elice smiled.

"Chocolate." Her grandmother voiced. "You'll get it for us?" Her grandmother asked, yet she already knew the answer.

"Of course I will grandmama." Elice said, she reached for the two dollars that her grandmother hands out for her. "I'll be back in a second."

Elice smiled as she practically skipped down the side walk; this was a natural routine, her grandmother would always send her off for some of Mr. Willy Wonka's all natural, all chocolate Wonka bars. The dinging bell on the door rang as Elice walked into the corner candy store. Elice looked around to see all of the colorful candies spilling into their containers, a woman at the counter boredly looked up from her magazine only to glance around the room once. Elice didn't mind, everyday she'd come in here and this would happen.

Elice stopped at the counter where many kinds of Wonka bars, with every different flavor imaginable, were lined up. Elice mouth watered at the sight, but her one and only flavor was the original, pure milk chocolate Wonka bar.

"Two Wonka bars, please." Elice asked, daring not to touch one until she paid.

"Two dollars.-" Elice gave the money; already knowing the price, "Hey kid, you sure you don't want anymore? You heard, right?" The woman dully started, placing the money into the cash register. "That kook, Wonka, he's letting little ones, like you, into his factory for a day." The woman finished.

"Oh, like a sweepstake? No one ever really wins that…" Elice laughed, shaking her head. "It just gets you to buy more bars."

"Yeah? Yeah, I thought the same; but, some little fat boy won last week, this week; it was a little snotty brat. Turn on the TV and you'll see her fake little up turned nose all over the screen." The woman fumed.

"So all you get is a tour or something?" Elice asked a little interested.

"Yeah, but who knows what Wonka has in that mammoth mountain." The woman tapped at the Wonka bars. Elice eyes widen—factory f-full! Of Wonka bars?

"Uh… um, well." Elice smiled, that huge factory, full of his delicious, creamy, milk chocolate, melt in your mouth Wonka bars! "Two's good for me." Elice said seeing the lady's knowing stare. The shop keeper shrugged; turning on her heel, Elice left the store.

Elice laid in her bed, looking up at her ceiling; she took her glasses off and rubbed her tired orange brown eyes. She didn't tell her grandmother about it—she'd have a heart attack if she'd know he was touring his chocolate heaven! But Elice was also feeling a little giddy, though sweepstakes let her down before. Elice rolled over in her bed and looked down at her nightstand; on top was today's Wonka bar. Elice reached over and picked it up, she turned it over then closed her eyes and sighed, she was so caught up in the Wonka manic, and she didn't even eat her bar.

"I'm being so silly…" Elice opened her eyes as she opened the candy bar—nothing. "So silly; I buy this thing everyday If I get one, I get one…"

A week has passed and that ticket was still on Elice's mind; seven Wonka bars and no cigar. Elice sighed as she walked into the store with one dollar in her hands; her grandmother felt ill today and shockingly didn't feel in the mood for chocolate. Elice walked over to the rows of Wonka bars, she handed the woman the dollar and reached for a Wonka bar.

Elice and the woman quickly looked up as the door slammed opened; a boy with brown hair and dark eyes, he was fairly short and had a bored look on his face—he looked to be about ten or eleven. The boy ran over to the counter and his eyes quickly scans over it; once it reached the blank spot, left behind by Elice, he looked up at the woman.

"What the heck! Who got here first?" The boy shouted at the woman. He then looked over to Elice and down at her bar. "I need this." The little boy quickly snatched the bar out of her hand; he practically threw the money at the woman and left the store.

"Feh, the nerve of kids these days; sorry sugar, grab another one." The woman said, going back into her daze.

Elice shrugged and reached into the line up of bars and walked out of the store; half way down the street, she opened the bar and bit into the chocolate—geez, the nerve of some people.

"_Ethan!"_

"Yeah, mum?" Ethan called as he walked down the stairs.

"The telly needs fix'n." His mom told him, trying to calm James down.

"Did someth'n come in the mail for me, mum?" Ethan asked, turning the TV around; he rolled his eyes as he saw that it was just unplugged.

"No, were you expecting some'n?" She asked, thanking him once the TV flashed on.

"No, nothing important." Ethan lied.

He was actually waiting for a check, last month he sold his machine to some kind of toothpaste factory; their sells were rising with Wonka's contest and they didn't want to cut their wealth with the cap screws in their factory, so they turned his screw driver into an automatic toothpaste cap driver. The man he met said that if they liked it, he'll pay him. It sounded shady, but he was paid 300 for the time being; that went into this months rent.

"I'm going for a walk, mum." Ethan said, she grunted in responds.

While Ethan walked down the street; he went into his pants pockets and pulled out the ten dollar bill. Hm, He still kept it; they didn't really have spending money this week—but they were living without the ten dollars—so he didn't quiet regret taking it from his mother. Ethan stuffed it back into his pocket and walked into the candy store.

"Hello, Ethan, buying today?" The shopkeeper asks.

"I don't know…" Ethan said, walking around the candy store.

"How about you try one of Wonka's chocolate bars?" The shopkeeper suggested, winking at him.

"I don't… not like I have a chance; it's just marketing." Ethan smirked, looking at the Wonka bars.

"No, no, no, those four kids found one!"

"You mean five. A millionaire casino man got hold of it." A strange guy said, walking past them, "Yup, last week he did." The man chipped in, it wasn't anything odd; people in this town barged into your business faster than one's parents.

"Yeah? Contest over then." Ethan shook his head—Wonka had millionaires craving a taste of his factory.

Ethan was feeling a pang of envy for the candy man, or the millionaire who silenced the whole shabang; however, it wasn't enough to force him to blow all his life savings away on trying to win; you couldn't live off of chocolate.

Ethan then remembered his ten dollar bill, "You know, I just might buy one." The shop keep smiled.

"Leave it to you, Ethan, to buy something when it loses value." The man winked.

Ethan laughed, hey, it's not his fault that you needed to be cheap to live in the world; he reached into his pocket and pulled out the wire wrapper, "Um…" Ethan emptied his empty pockets. "Uh, rein check on that one, sorry." Ethan laughed—ten dollars down the drain; blowing in the frosty winds some where.

"No problem, Ethan, tell that mum of yours, I said hi." The shopkeeper waved.

"Oh, sorry." Ethan said as he almost ran into a little boy.

"No, it's okay." The boy replied back. Ethan shook his head and went on the way out.

"-and I guess I'll take one Wonka bar, please."

"Sure thing, Charlie." Was the last thing Ethan heard as he walked home.

"_Fizzle sticks and Wangdoodles!_"

All the Oompa-Loompas stopped and covered their mouths; Wonka just turned off the TV from seeing the fourth—and _not_ planed—ticket winner from last week. Wonka fumed and picked up his cane, he got rid of that nuisance, Monlette or something.

"How could this have happened? I've made sure, I've checked it all! What was that little boys name; Max? Mitch? I can't believe this!" Wonka cursed silently, now this scruff kid got the last one—where in the world did he get the money, damn it—as he stumbled across the floor and outside of his TV room, Wonka fumbled with his sungoggles.

"One day, all I have is _one_ day…"

_**

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**Author Note:** Wow, we're getting some where; the next one should be going into the factory. Yeah, I got my main character in—don't get too attached to Ethan… he's kind of not that important; just a filler character really. You probably caught on when I explained his whole life story in this one chapter. He'll be in the next chapter, but only for a short while, then—poof—no more Ethan.

This is only the beginning of my story really, this story will carry on long after the contest; let me shut up now before I ruin the story.


	3. Six ‘lucky’ contest winners

Inattentive Contretemps

**Author Note:** Yay, fact-tore-E time =D, I wonder how people feel about this, I'm way too impatient to wait for reviews. I thought of approaching this story in many different ways, but this one stuck. Don't worry about the whole CATCF movie ending in this chapter, doesn't mean it stops there.

**Warning:** Harm to children and their guardians—He's only playing.

**Disclaimer:** *looks in purse* Nope, still don't have that contract for world—… oh; this is my CATCF fic, not my letter to the world's dominators inc.… sorry.

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**Chapter two:** _Six_ 'lucky' contest winners.

"Mum! D'you check the mail?" Ethan called.

"Shush, Ethan! They're all lining up at the factory!" Ethan raised an eyebrow as he walked into the living room. "Look at them, all probably freezing their arses off; that Wonka, still up to his tricks."

Ethan looked to see that probably a million people, waiting outside the factory gates. Ethan squinted his eyes to see five children standing at the gates. So they were going in, eh? The door bell gave a demented squeal—now he had to fix that too.

"I'll get it." Ethan walked over to the door; he stopped when he saw an envelope at the bottom of the door, he scoped that up on the way.

Ethan opened the door and blinked, in front of him was a man, who looked to be somewhere around his mother's age; he had sheet pale skin and cordovan colored locks that draped around his neck in a page boy style. His clothing was odd—a purple and deep maroon Victorian styled suit with dark gloves; a top hat to match. Though, the strangest thing on his person was an odd pair of goggles.

"Hello, little boy." The man said in a weird child like voice.

"Mum! There's a guy here for you!" Ethan called; he wasn't surprised when there were no answer

"Sorry, she's probably asleep." Ethan started.

"Well that's good, no awkward meetings then." The man said smiling, Ethan raised an eyebrow. "Oh… right. Um." The man cleared his throat.

"Greetings to you, the lucky finder of this Golden Ticket, from Mr. Willy Wonka. Present this ticket at the factory gates at ten o'clock in the morning of the first day of October, and do not be late. You may bring with you one member of your own family but no one else. In your wildest dreams you could not imagine the marvelous surprises that await you." Ethan stared as the man read off of what looked like a crumbled napkin; which he stuffed back into his pocket.

"It's not what the others said, but I didn't keep a copy; so I got the old print." The man rambled. He then looked over to Ethan. "Now come on, we have so much time and so little to see. Wait a minute! Strike that. Reverse it. Thank you."

"Who… are you?" Ethan asks, he was staring at this man like he was some side show attraction. "I don't have any money." Ethan added, he better not be one of those charity folk.

"No, oh dear boy, no. I'm Willy Wonka, and I invite you, lucky child, into my factory." The man stuck out his hand, Ethan shook it.

"So, you're '_Willy_ _Wonka'_?" Ethan asked after their awkward shake.

"That's right; now let's go~." Wonka said, getting impatient.

"Wait, I—I can't!" Ethan started.

"Well, why not?" Wonka questioned, he was half way down the stairs as he turned.

"I… Wait, give me a minute; let me think!" Ethan sighed. He looked down at the envelope in his hands; if this was what he thought it was—then he wouldn't need this stupid tour.

"Ethan! Who was at the door?" Ethan blinked and looked back; his mom was laying on the couch, craning her head to look at him.

"Are you coming or not? We can make do without you." Wonka fumed; he didn't even pick this little boy.

"No one, mum!" Ethan called back. He then looked back at the envelope and tore into it. Wonka sighed as he looked at an imaginary wrist watch. "Yes!" Ethan cried out.

"You're coming?" Wonka perked up.

"No, no I'm not." Wonka face fell. Ethan was ecstatic; he just got a check from the toothpaste company—$30,000! More than half of what he and his dad put into the machine!

"Ethan?" His mom called.

"Catch you later, Wonka!" Ethan shined and slammed the door.

Never in his life… Wonka sighed; he wouldn't have been a good heir anyways, he cost him five minutes of his time. Wonka rolled his shoulders and walked into his elevator; where he was lifted to his next destination—America; Elice Nervada.

"Grandmama!" Elice cried out as her grandmother hunched over coughing. "Your—your feet; they've swollen!" Elice stated; her grandmother lifted her feet into the bed and hid them under the cover.

"Oh no, child; it's fine, it's fine." Her grandmother said, lifting her head onto the pillow. "I'm fine dear, you go and play."

"But, grandmama…" Elice paused; what was happening to her, she couldn't even stomach the chocolate anymore. The doorbell rang, "I'll get it." Elice said on instinct, there was no way her grandmother was going to get the door; even if Elice allowed her.

Elice walked over to the door and opened it; she blinked as a strange man stood on her doorstep. He looked a little flustered and in a hurry.

"_Congratulations_; now come on." Elice squeaked as the man grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of the door frame. Elice's head spun as he pulled her into a clear contraption that in seconds lifted into the air. She began to scream as the ground disappeared from under her.

"Calm down; you don't want to look like a mad person on TV do you?" The man said calmly as the thing began to lower onto the ground after a few minutes in the clouds. He reached over and lifted Elice onto her feet.

"Please enter." The man said, speaking into something on his jacket. "Come forward." He spoke again. He dragged Elice along as he went from the side of the building. "Close the gates." Elice stared up at him weirdly; she'd no idea what he was talking about—or even what he was doing.

Elice gasped as she saw all the people standing behind the gate; she looked to her right to see the factory loom over everyone. "Dear visitors, it is my great pleasure to welcome you to my humble factory." The people continued to walk forward. "And who am I? Well…" Elice blinked as a song began to play.

"Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka, the amazing chocolatier, weeeeee-"

Elice gasped as the man pulled her along, rambling something along the lines of 'missing it'. She saw ten people standing in front of the factory doors; they were staring at the singing puppets so hard that they didn't notice the man drag her in line next to them.

"Poof." The man said as he poked her, causing her to jump closer to another man who donned an expensive looking black coat.

"-The best darn guy who ever lived; _Willy Wonka_, here he is~!" The dolls finished and a red chair lifted into the middle; sparks sprayed out, the show was amazing… if the dolls didn't set fire and begin to melt; its eyes were popping out and everything. The man didn't seem to mind as he began clapping.

"Wasn't that just magnificent?" The man said, everyone looked over at him. "I was worried it was getting a little doggy in the middle part, but then that finale, _wow_!" They all stared at him strangely as he walked up the steps to turn in front of them.

"Who are you?" A girl with a blond page boy cut asked.

"He's Willy Wonka." An old man said.

"Really?" The little boy next to him asked.

Everyone didn't seem convinced; they all stared at him in awkward silence. Wonka kept his smile as he looked at everyone; it started to falter a little as he looked between them. His mouth opened and closed as he tried to think of a way to break the silence.

"Good morning, starshine, the earth says hello." Wonka greeted awkwardly Everyone looked around at each other, trying to understand what this crazy guy was talking about.

Wonka's smiled fell and he reached in his pocket to pull out a pack of note cards and began to read from it, "'Dear guests, greetings'." Wonka looked up and smiled, he then went back to reading, "'Welcome to the factory [I shake you warmly by the hand]'." He stopped and reached his hand out for someone to shake, but no one went to shake it. His smile faltered slightly as he rolled his hand back. "'My name is Willy Wonka'." The man smile brightens, filling with confidence, as he looked around.

"Then shouldn't you be up there?" The girl with a mink fur coat said, pointing to the red chair.

"I couldn't very well watch the show from up there, now _could I_ little girl?" Wonka replied curtly.

"Mr. Wonka, I don't know if you'll remember me," The old man started. Wonka pocketed his note cards and looked over to him, "but I used to Work here in the factory."

"Were you one of those despicable spies who tried to steal my life's work and sell it to parasitic, copycat, candy-making cads?" Wonka said, hate traced in his voice.

"No sir…" The old man said, a little confused at how this conversation was turning into a bad one.

"Then wonderful, welcome back." Wonka perked up; it seemed like he really didn't care though. Wonka lifted his cane so he was just holding it, "Let's get a move on kids." Wonka turned and began to walk into the factory.

Everyone quickly straighten to follow, "Don't you want to know our names?" The little fat boy said as everyone rushed in.

"Can't imagine how it would matter." Wonka said, blowing him off. "Come quickly. Far too much to see~." Wonka called.

Elice looked around nervously; she was truly confused. She knew this had to be the contest tour, but she was confused as to why she was here—she didn't win anything!

"Just drop your coats anywhere." Wonka said, already stripping himself of his dressings.

Everyone hesitantly followed as he chucked his own coat off to the side. Elice looked slightly embarrassed as she touched her bare shoulders; all she had was her orange cami shirt—she removed her uniform top when she first came home—she just hope they would think it was a tank top. Good thing that's all that was missing when Wonka barged in and abducted her—at least she had her rainbow knee highs to keep her warm… mostly.

"Mr. Wonka? Sure is toasty in here." A balding man with glasses said, looking more than pleased to be able to remove his coat.

"What?" Wonka asked as if he just notice the man was there; tuning around towards him, "I have to keep it warm in here. My workers are used to an extremely hot climate." Wonka told them; his face full of emotion, "They just can't stand the cold." Wonka said and turned—he was so animated when he talked; he looked like a commercial, he pulled you in when you looked at him.

"Who are the workers?" A poor looking boy asked.

Wonka turned with a smile on his face, "All in good time." The little boy looked up to Wonka as if he were his role model, "Now." Wonka said and turned around everyone then began to follow him again.

As they were walking, the girl in a blue jump suit rushed next to him and hugged his side; Wonka gasped and shrunk into himself as if she were a leper. After her 'loving' hug, she stepped back.

"Mr. Wonka, I'm Violet Beauregarde." The little girl introduced.

Wonka pulled a face and tried to straighten up, "I don't care." Wonka said back, cringing at her touch.

"Well you should care." She countered, "Because I'm gonna win the special prize at the end." The girl said; certain.

"Well, you do seem confident, and confidence is key." Wonka said, turning to her with a nod. The girl smiled and looks back at her mother, who gave her a knowing look.

The girl in the mink coat jumped out in front of Wonka, "I'm Veruca Salt; it's very nice to meet you sir." Wonka jumped as he stopped himself from running into her. The girl cheesed and curtsied, Wonka tried to give a fake smiled; but he failed.

"I always thought a verruca was a type of wart you got on the bottom of your foot. Ha." The girl's smile fell, Wonka's fell as well when the chubby kid stopped him from continuing forward.

The boy took a chunk out of his Wonka bar before he began, "I am Augustus Gloop. I love you shocolate." The boy said in between chews.

"I can see that." Wonka's lip curled, he then looked down and smiled at the boy, "So do I, I never expected to have so much in common." Wonka stepped forward, but stopped.

He had a soft sneer on his face as he turned around, slightly covered by a smile; he looked down at one of the boys, "You, you're Mike _T-V_." Wonka stressed his last name. He had a smile on his face, but it clashed badly with the vibe of dislike. "You're the little devil who cracked the system." Elice looked over at him; he was that little rude boy that took her bar earlier.

Wonka focused fell off Mike and turned to the unfortunate looking child, he gave a friendly smile. "And you. Well, you're just lucky to be here, aren't you?" Wonka said. He looked up and turned to all the adults. "And you all must be their—…" Everyone waited as he seemed to have a problem.

"-Parents." Mr Salt stated, helping him out.

"-Yeah." Wonka smiled; coming back from his sputter, "Moms and Dads…" Wonka's face fell as he stared off into space, "Dad?" Wonka called out. His eyes widen, "Papa?" Everyone looked at him oddly, some shrinking back. Wonka snapped out of it and looked around, he then smiled nervously.

"Okay then, let's move along." He then quickly turned. Elice rushed to his side and grabbed his free hand.

"Mr. Wonka." She said tugging on it; Wonka stopped and looked down at her. "I'm Elice Nervada." She said, releasing his hand. She then looked back and forth as everyone stared at her; she nervously and awkwardly bowed her head in a little curtsy, but the move was stiff and jerky.

"I know." He said not caring and a little impatient as he pushed her aside to start his walk again. Elice stared oddly but picked up her pace to catch up.

Elice walked awkwardly behind them as they followed Wonka. She looked to the side to see Mike walking next to her; he didn't seem to care about the atmosphere as much as everyone else did—and if she didn't know any better—she'd say he didn't seem to want to be here.

"What are you looking at?" Elice blinked to see Mike staring right at her.

"Nothing." She said; he was rude, but she should know better then to stare. They continued to walk and the hallway looked as if it were shrinking. As they grew closer to a small door; they all had to squeeze in to see.

"An important room; this, after all, is a chocolate factory." Wonka started.

"Then why is the door so small?" Mike asked; he talked with a condescending flare so that each word sounded so harsh.

Wonka didn't seem to like the boy as he looked up at him, "That's to keep all the great big chocolatey flavor inside, ha." Wonka laughed his quirky laugh, and quickly turned around; as he reached down, he stuffed the key into the tiny hole of the door. He then turned to everyone, gave a sly smile, and pushed the wall open.

The room was no short of amazing; colorful, lush green grass; the trees were leafless but were filled with odd looking fruit. Giant colorful pumpkins and mushroom, but what really caught the eye were the giant waterfall, attached with its own river—though it was a thick brown! Wonka walked in, and no one hesitated to follow; he led everyone down the small hill into the room.

"Now, do be careful, my dear children." Wonka stated seriously, "Don't lose your heads…" He said for dramatics, "_Don't get_ _over excited_." He joked; though everyone was at lost for words, they probably didn't hear him. "Just keep very calm…" As the crowed drew closer, they saw the river was actually chocolate.

"It's beautiful." A boy said.

"What?" Wonka asked, turning back to the crowd, probably out of his own daze, "Oh yeah, it's very beautiful." He agreed, walking the crowd closer.

"Every drop of the river is hot melted chocolate of the finest quality." Wonka started, taking everyone over the bridge; he stopped at the bottom and turned around. "The waterfall is most important; mixes the chocolate. Churns it up; makes it light and frothy." Wonka told, using his hands to emphasis "By the way, no other factory in the world mixes its chocolate by waterfall, my dear children—and you can take that to the bank." Wonka said proudly, turning around and walking further.

Wonka stopped and stepped off to the side as he began to wave everyone forward; he paused and looked up as he heard metal grinding together. He stared as a tube was lowering to the river.

"People." Wonka called; everyone stopped and turned their attention on him. "Those pipes—" Wonka pointed, "Suck up the chocolate, and carry it—away all over the factory." Everyone followed the tube. "Thousand of gallons an hour." Everyone tuned their attention back to Wonka "Yeah." He nodded, answering their silent amazement

"And do you like my meadow? Try some of my grass." Wonka pointed around him, "Please have a blade. Please do; it's so delectable and so darn good looking." Wonka smiled.

"You can eat the grass?" The boy voiced everyone's thoughts.

"Of course you can." Wonka replied, as if it were a silly question. "Everything in this room is eatable; even _I'm_ eatable," Wonka gestured to himself, "but that is called cannibalism, my dear children, and is, in fact, frowned upon in most societies." Wonka nodded his head; as if the information was not known, "Yeah."

He then gestured off, "Enjoy." Augustus wasted no time as he hopped off; but the others were a little hesitant. "Go on. Scoot, scoot." Wonka smiled as he waved them all off.

Everyone followed the path and then broke off into their own separate ways. Elice smiled as she got a better look at the room, she grinned and reached down to pluck out a piece of grass; she felt silly but popped the small piece into her mouth—it was delicious! The flavor of green apple sugar paper; Elice shined and plucked a few more, she then walked off to check out the odd trees with their hanging fruit. Elice stopped as she heard a small bell; she looked down to see a chocolate bunny, a hanging bell ribboned around its neck.

"Look at you." Elice bent over and picked up the bunny, it squirmed and sniffed the air; nearly giving her a heart attack, "Oh my gosh!" She breath as she steadied the chocolate bunny in her hands. It began to sniff at her face and nibble at her hair as she held it. "Awe… now I can't eat you." Elice laughed, placing it back on the ground, "Scurry a long tiny rabbit." She cooed, it sat for a while, and then sniffed the air; the chocolate bunny then hopped off—leaving a polka dotted egg in its place.

Elice picked it up; she inspected it for a second, but then bit into it; where milk chocolate filled her mouth. "Wow… hey, wait up you." Elice called and chased after it.

Elice caught up to the bunny and plucked it from the ground; it dropped another chocolate egg; striped this time. "Daddy, look over there!" Elice looked up, loosing the bunny; she stuffed the egg into her pocket as she walked over to see the commotion. "Look, it's a little person." The girl said. Everyone, even Wonka, came over to see.

"There's two of them." Mrs. Beauregarde stated.

"There's more than two." Mr. Teavee said.

The men were collecting the candies from the odd trees and ground. "Where do they come from?" Mrs. Gloop questioned.

"Who are they?" The boy asked.

"Are they real people?" Mike asked Wonka.

"Of coursed their real people." Wonka looked away, offended, "Their Oompa-Loompas."

"'Oompa-Loompas'?" Mr. Salt asked.

"Imported directly from Loompaland." Wonka added.

"There's no such place." Mr. Teavee said; Wonka's head turned towards him with a small scowl, insulted.

"What?" He asked, not seeming to believe what he's heard.

"Mr. Wonka, I teach high school geography, and I'm here to tell you-" Mr. Teavee started, showing his smarts.

"-Well, then you'll know all about it, and, oh, what a terrible country it is." Wonka finished for him; the man looked at him, but Wonka gave him a look.

"The whole place is nothing but thick jungles infested by the most dangerous beasts in the entire world; Hornswogglers and snozzwangers and those terrible, wicked whangdoodles. I went to Loompaland looking for exotic new flavors for candy. Instead, I found Oompa-Loompas. They lived in tree houses to escape from the fierce creatures who lived below." Wonka referred out to them.

"The Oompa-Loompas ate nothing but green caterpillars, which tasted revolting. The Oompa-Loompas looked for other things to mash up with the caterpillars to make them taste better; red beetles, the bark of the bong-bong tree; all of them beastly—but not quiet so beastly as the caterpillars." Wonka shivered; maybe he tasted them?

"But the food they longed for the most was the cocoa bean. An Oompa-Loompa was lucky if he found three or four cocoa beans a year; but, oh, how they craved them. All they'd ever think about was cocoa beans—"

Wonka paused, ready to explain, "The cocoa bean is the thing from which chocolate is made," He then went back into his thoughts, "—so I told the chief," He then started to do some weird hand gestures. "'Come live in my factory. You can have all the cocoa beans you want!'" He voiced, ending his gestures—that added onto the weird looks the crowd gave him.

"They are such wonderful workers." Wonka finished, "I feel I must warn you, though; they are rather mischievous." Wonka smiled knowingly. "Always making jokes…" He smirked, as if laughing from past experience.

"Augustus, my child, that is not a good thing you do!" Mrs. Gloop shouted, bringing everyone's attention to her missing son.

The group looked over to see Augustus across the room, scooping up the chocolate in his mouth. Wonka's face instantly fell as he saw the sight.

"Hey, Little boy!" Wonka called, rushing slightly to the edge of the river. "My chocolate must be untouched by human hands!" Wonka said, faltering as he notice the boy didn't hear; or seem to care.

The boy then cried out and tumbled into the river, Wonka grimaced as he looked away in disgust; everyone else looking on in fear. The boy plopped back up over the surface, but with his face covered in chocolate and his mindless flap of his arms, the boy was beginning to float further from the edge.

"He'll drown." His mother gasped shocked. She ran over to Wonka; who looked to be sick, "He can't swim! Save him!" She shouted at him, frantically pointing. "Augustus, no!" She shouted, hurting at seeing him flop around. "Augustus!"

Elice looked up to see Wonka not doing anything; he didn't make a move toward Augustus—he was looking off into the sky! Elice followed his gaze to see the tube he spoke of earlier; it was in the path of landing near Augustus. The tube lowered and began to suck in chocolate; creating a giant world pool—which Augustus was unwillingly pulled into.

"Augustus, watch out!" Mrs. Gloop shouted; though futile.

Augustus was pulled into the world pool, forced to spin around as he got closer and closer to the tube. Mrs. Gloop pulled out some sort of chocolate roll from her purse; biting it to calm her nerves. Augustus screamed as he spun without being able to see what caused it. He went down, and not a second later, he popped through the pipe; lodged at the bottom.

The pipe stressed to pull him through; all most popping as chocolate burst out the siding. After a second, it pulled him further up the pipe. "There he goes…" Violet said, watching him go up.

"Call the fire brigade!" Mrs. Gloop shouted, everyone stood helpless.

"It's a wonder how that pipe is big enough?" Mrs. Beauregarde stated, shaking her head in disbelieve.

"It isn't big enough, he's slowing down." The boy said.

"He's gonna stick." Mike added.

"Mr. Wonka, do something." Elice mumbled, but Wonka just stared on with a blank face.

"I think he has." Mr. Teavee said, referring to Mike.

Augustus stops moving, nearly at the top. "He's blocked the whole pipe." Mr. Salt said.

"Look, the Oompa-Loompas." The boy said, moving everyone's attention.

The Oompa-Loompas bobbed to a rhythm as they collected the candy; they were also mumbling incoherently. "What are they doing?" Veruca asked.

"Why, I believe they're going to treat us to a little song." Wonka said, trying to hide his growing smirk. "It's quite a special occasion of course; they haven't had a fresh audience in many a moon." Wonka added; though what he said seemed shady.

Music began to erupt as the men dropped their items and began to run to the bridge and around the area where the pipe stood. "Augustus Gloop, Augustus Gloop, The great big greedy Nincompoop." The Oompa-Loompas started, Wonka wiggling slightly to the tune.

"Augustus Gloop, so big and vile, so greedy foul and infantile—'Come on', we cry, 'the time is ripe to send him shooting up the pipe'." The Oompa-Loompa danced. "But don't, dear children be alarmed" Everyone looked over as an Oompa-Loompa a few feet away began to sing, "Augustus Gloop will not be harmed, Augustus Gloop will not be harmed." Everyone eyes went over to another patch of Oompa-Loompas.

Several Oompa-Loompas placed a yellow swimming cap over their heads; they then leaped into the river. "Although of course we must admit, he will be altered quite a bit, slowly wheels go round and round, and cogs begin to grind and pound. This greedy brute, this louses ear, is loved by people everywhere, for who could hate or bare a grudge against a luscious bit of fudge~?" Augustus then zipped further up the pipe and into the round metal top; where the clear glass didn't reach.

As the Oompa-Loompas finished their song, they then ran off to where they once reside. "Bravo, well done." Wonka cheered, clapping. "Aren't they delightful? Aren't they charming?" Wonka asked, still applauding.

No one seemed as amused as Wonka did. "I do say, that all seemed rather rehearsed." Mr. Salt said, voicing everyone's thoughts. Wonka looked like he disagreed

"Like they knew it was going to happen." Mike said, hinting on to foul play. Wonka glared down at the boy; he really wasn't going to like him.

"Oh, poppycock." Wonka said, though he didn't seem to try and convince otherwise, he then turned and avoided eye contact. Everyone looked off after him, Mrs. Gloop rushed over.

"Where is my son? Where does that pipe go to?" Mrs. Gloop asked concern.

"That pipe," Wonka started, happy to explain his creation, "it just so happens to lead directly to the room where I make the most delicious strawberry-flavored, chocolate-coated fudge." He ended with a smile.

Mrs. Gloop was frantic, "Then he will be made into strawberry-flavored, chocolate coated fudge." Wonka face began to fall, "They'll be selling him by the pound—all over the world?"

"No, I wouldn't allow it." Wonka said plainly, shocked at her accusations, "the taste would be terrible." Mrs. Gloop's face faltered, "Can you imagine; Augustus-flavored, chocolate-coated Gloop?—Ew—no one would buy it."

He then turned and made a weird call; which brought over one of his Oompa-Loompas. Everyone crowded over as Wonka bent down, "I want you to take Mrs. Gloop up to the Fudge room, okay?" The little Oompa-Loompa waited patiently, "Help her find her son. Take a long stick and start poking around in the big chocolate mixing barrel, kay?" Wonka said, using his cane for example.

The Oompa-Loompa crossed its arms; which were mirrored by Wonka; it then nodded its head. The Oompa-Loompa walked over to Mrs. Gloop and tugged on her dress; she stared questionably at Wonka, and followed once he gave her the 'okay'.

"Mr. Wonka?" The boy asked.

"Huh?" Wonka turned his attention over to him.

"Why would Augustus' name be in the Oompa-Loompas' song, unless-"

"-Improvisation is a parlor trick. Anyone can do it." Wonka said, upturning his nose. "You little girl, say something—anything." He waved at Violet.

"Chewing gum." Violet said.

"Chewing gum is really gross, chewing gum I hate the most." Wonka sung, "See, exactly the same." He brushed.

"No it isn't." Mike said, not convinced.

Wonka turned, "Uh, you really shouldn't mumble; because I can't understand a word you are saying." Wonka smiled, ignoring him. Mike got the hint and just glared up at him. "Now, on with the tour." Wonka began, walking forward. Elice blinked as she heard Wonka mumbled something along the lines of 'liked that one, too.'

Wonka carried the group closer to a wider part of the river, when he stopped, drums were heard. Looking down the river; a pink sea horse canoe, it looked as if it was made of rock candy—and it probably was—rolled down the river. Wonka waited until the boat stopped where the empty section was in front of everyone; the Oompa-Loompas turned and began to laugh.

"What's so funny?" Violet asked, sneering.

"I think it's from all those doggone cocoa beans." Wonka said, not even sure himself—they spend their work on the boat; not a surprise if they've scooped up a little.

"Hey, by the way, did you guys know that chocolate contains a property that triggers the release of endorphins?" Wonka started innocently, speaking on what chocolate could do to the anatomy "Gives one the feeling of being in love." Wonka smiled; giving some light on something the little girls would be interested in.

"_You don't say_." Mrs. Beauregarde, batted at what seem to her as a dalliance.

Wonka stared at her, trying to keep up his smile. "All aboard" Wonka squeaked nervously, rushing the pregnant silence.

Everyone stumbled into the boat; the old man reached out to help Elice in, with her absence of an adult—which didn't seemed to go without notice to them.

"Where's your parents?" The boy asked her; Elice looked down sadly.

"Or guardians?" The old man asked; understanding.

"Onward." Wonka waved once he entered the boat.

"Um… My grandma—_mother_ is at home…" Elice corrected; the last thing she wanted was to be called a baby.

The boy and the old man stared at her oddly, and she realized how weird it was for her to be here without a chaperon; what was she to say to that—'the mad man of the factory abducted her'? Though it'd be smart in a situation like that; but his factory was so amazing, Elice wasn't complaining now!

"What are your names?" Elice asked them, changing their minds of the could be issue.

"I'm Charlie, and this is my grandpa; Joe." Charlie introduced. "Your name's E-lice, right? Is it Spanish? You sound Spanish…" Charlie said, catching on to her accent.

"Um, Italian." Elice corrected.

Charlie's eyes bulged, "You came all the way from Italy?"

Elice laughed. "Yes, yes; about eleven years ago—I was born out of Italy; in America." Elice told. "My parents had a strong accent."

"Oh." Charlie said.

"Here." Wonka said beside them, "Try some of this; it'll do you good— you look starved to death." Wonka said, giving Charlie a ladle of chocolate. He drunk some and passed it down to his grandpa.

"It's great!" Charlie said as his grandpa took a drink and passed it down to Elice.

"That's because it's mixed by waterfall." Wonka stated, he turned to the group that sat in front of him, "The waterfall is most important. Mixes the chocolate, churns it up; makes it light and frothy. By the way, no other factory in the world m—"

"-You already said that." Veruca cut in, tired of his rambling.

Wonka paused and his eyes narrowed at her, he clenched his fist as his frowned deepened "You're all quiet short, aren't you?" Wonka started, smiling smugly.

"Well, _yeah_, we're _children_." Violet countered, blowing off his comment.

"_Well, that's no excuse_, I was never as short as _you_." Wonka flicked back.

"You were once." Mike joined in.

"Was not—know why? Because I distinctly remember putting a hat on top of my head" Wonka said, gesturing to it. "Look at your short little arms; you could never reach." Wonka teased, giggling. The kids turned around; seeing no way around the whole conversation in the first place.

"Do you remember what it was like; being a kid?" Charlie asked Wonka.

"Oh boy, do I." Wonka said, looking off fondly. He paused after a time as his gaze drifted, "Do I?" Charlie looked up at him as Wonka stared off into space

"What's that, Mr. Wonka?" Charlie asked, pointing to the cave the boat was entering, but was ignored as Wonka's eyes clouded over. "Mr. Wonka? Mr. Wonka?" Charlie asked shaking Wonka out of his thoughts.

"We're heading into a tunnel" Charlie said, pointing.

"Oh yeah, full speed ahead." Wonka called, but his face was still confused and lost.

The drummer bangs faster as he signaled them to row quicker; the boat turned and headed into the tunnel "How can they see where they're going?" Violet asked; referring to how the Oompa-Loompas faced backwards.

"They can't. There's no knowing where their going." Wonka said truthfully.

The boat was further into the dark tunnel, "Switch on the lights." Wonka called and the tunnel flicked on; lighting the room just in time for everyone to see the drop down into the rapid river.

It was like a roller coaster; everyone was at lost for wards as they weren't expecting the gentle boat ride to pick up in pace. Charlie smiled as the ride tickled his stomach; the Oompa-Loompa drummer pace increased as did the rowing. As the boat met the bottom of the steep river, it gave a jolt, and settled back into a smooth pace.

"People, keep an eye out." Wonka said, catching everyone's attention. "We're passing some very important rooms." He said.

The group looked at the passing doors to read; clotted cream, coffee cream, and hair cream. Mrs. Beauregarde turned and look back to Wonka.

"What do you use hair cream for?" She asked.

"To lock in moister, ha." Wonka laughed, primping his hair as he said this.

Mrs. Beauregarde looked away oddly; though it was indeed obvious, what he said wasn't expected. Everyone's attention turned to a room, which its door was fully open, to see several Oompa-Loompas who were whipping a cow—Elice frowned.

"Whipped cream." Charlie said, getting it.

"Precisely, heh." Wonka smiled.

"That doesn't make any sense." Veruca said.

Wonka turned, his mood killed. "For your information little girl; whipped cream isn't whipped cream at all, unless it's been whipped with whips." Wonka then gave a fake smile, "Everybody knows that." It turned into a sneer once they all looked away.

The drummer began to quickly bang again and the boat picked up pace. Faster than before; everyone but Wonka squinted as the wind whipped past their faces. The water was rocky and the ride began to get rougher as everyone tried to keep still—Wonka sat as if he didn't notice. Charlie grinned at the ride and Wonka grinned back—enjoying his little roller coaster. The boat spun side ways as it zoomed past more rooms; it rolled down another steep hill and slid into a lighted room. Everyone looked in awe as the light seeped in from the ceiling.

"Stop the boat." Wonka called, "I wanna show you guys something…" Wonka said excitedly. The boat slowed more as it began to stop near a door named 'inventing room'.

Everyone exited the boat as Wonka turned the wheeled handle and the group filled the room. Wonka walked forward as everyone looked around at the metal room; at all the inventions and test tubes.

"Now, this is the most important room in the entire factory." Wonka turned in front of everyone. "Now everyone enjoy yourselves—but just don't… touch anything." Wonka cringed, hoping they could follow that order.

"Okay. Go on." Wonka shooed them once again. "Go on, scoot." This time no one hesitated; if the last room…

Wonka smiled was a little sinister in nature and Elice stared at him timidly. Wonka jumped slightly when he notices her still standing there; he then stood awkwardly as well and shooed her off, he walked off to the side and began to 'inspect' one of his concoctions. Elice raised an eyebrow but ignored her suspicions of him. She ran off to where everyone else was as they crowed around some kind of water thing; Oompa-Loompas were swimming around in it as it shot out small balls.

"Hey Mr. Wonka, what's this?" Violet called.

"Oh!" Wonka turned, stalking over to them. "Let me show you." Wonka said as he reached them. He stopped at the pool and reached in; an Oompa-Loompa popped out and handed him a red ball. "Thank you." Wonka turned to everyone, ball in hand.

"These are Everlasting Gobstoppers." Wonka started as everyone crowed around. "They're for children who are given very little allowance money. You can suck on it all year, and it'll never get any smaller." Wonka smiled. "Ha, isn't that neat." He laughed.

"It's like gum." Violet said.

Wonka's face faltered, "No—gum is for chewing—and if you tried chewing one of these gobstoppers; you'll break all your little teeth off." Everyone stared at him weirdly. "But they sure do taste terrific." Wonka gushed; walking off.

Everyone followed him as he stopped at one table. "And this is Hair Toffee." Wonka started and picked one up. "You suck down one of these little boogers; and in exactly a half an hour, a brand new crop of hair will grow out over the top of your little noggin, and a mustache, and a _beard_." Wonka smiled.

"Who wants a _beard_?" Mike asked snootily.

"Well, beatniks for one, folk singers and motorbike riders; y'know, all those hip, jazzy, super cool, neat, keen, and groovy cats; it's in the fridge, daddy-o!" Wonka strayed, walking closer to Mike, "Are you hip to the jive? Can you dig what I'm layin' down? I knew that you could; slide me some skin, soul brother!" Mike stepped back from his outstretched hand; as if it was infested.

Wonka pulled his hand back as he notices no one would reach for it, "Unfortunately, the mixture isn't right yet; because, an Oompa-Loompa tried some yesterday, and, well, he…" Wonka turned and a mop of hair scooted forward.

"How are you today?" Wonka said, raising his voice a little so the Oompa-Loompa could hear him under the hair. The Oompa-Loompa gave him two thumbs up, "Y-you look great." Wonka lied, smiling nervously.

The group walks on, only to stop at the sound of an Oompa-Loompa clanging a machine Wonka smiled excitedly and walked over to two levers, "Watch this." He smiled as he pulled the one with the red handle.

The machine burst into life as Wonka jogged over to the group; the machine bumped and grind as it shook from the work. A protruding object stretched out and Wonka ran to the side of it, everyone else followed. The object then unraveled until it was a tiny strip; which produced an equally tiny strip of gum. Violet, of course, was the one to grab for it.

"You mean that's it?" Mike asked, not liking the whole commotion over a big machine—and all it spit out is gum.

"Do you even know what _it_ is?" Wonka asked, not liking Mike's tone.

"It's gum." Violet answers

"Yeah." Wonka said. "It's a stick of the most amazing and sensational gum in the whole universe. Ha." Wonka laughed, getting ecstatic, "Know why?—_Know why_? Because this gum is a full three course dinner all by itself." Wonka shinned, laughing. No one seemed to share his excitement.

"Why would anyone want that?" Mr. Salt asks, not really understanding what was so great.

Wonka notice their lack of excitement and started to think on his reasons—nothing. He fumbled in his jacket and pulled out his note cards; flipping past the first one, "'It will be the end of all kitchens and all cooking; just a little strip of Wonka's magic chewing gum and that is all you will'—" Wonka quickly flicked to the next card, "-'ever need for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. This piece of gum happens to be tomato soup, roast beef, and blueberry pie'." Wonka looked up and smiled nervously.

"It sounds great." Grandpa Joe said to humor him.

"It sounds weird." Veruca said.

"It sounds like my kind of gum." Violet added, she spit out her gum and placed it behind her ear.

"Uh, I'd rather you didn't. There are still some things that are w—"

"I'm the world record holder in chewing gum; I'm not afraid of _anything_!" Violet told as she stuffed the gum into her mouth.

Wonka looked on awkwardly as he thought on what she said. Violet went on chewing the gum. "How is it honey?" Her mother asked.

Violet turned towards her mother. "It's amazing!" She then turned to Wonka, "Tomato soup; I can feel it running down my throat!"

"Yeah—_spit it out_." Wonka smiled.

"Young lady, I think you better~—" Grandpa Joe said.

"-It's changing." Violet cut him off, ignoring them both. "Roast beef, with bake potato; crispy skin and butter."

"Keep chewing kiddo." Her mother prompt, "My little girl's gonna be the first person to have a chewing-gum meal." She gushed.

Wonka smiled nervously, "Yeah, I'm just a little concerned with the—"

"-Blueberry pie and ice-cream!" Violet exclaimed

"That part…" Wonka nodded.

"What's happening to her nose?" Veruca asked; the first one to see.

Everyone looked over to see a blue spot on her nose grow, "It's turning blue." Mr. Salt said.

"Her whole nose has gone purple." Her mother said, watching as it branched from her nose and to her cheeks

"What do you mean?" Violet asked, tapping at her noes.

"Violet—you're turning _violet_!" Her mother gasped. "What's happening?" She looked over towards Wonka; Violet's whole top face now indigo.

"Well, I told you I hadn't quiet got it right because it goes a little funny when it gets to the dessert—it's the blueberry pie that does it." Wonka confessed; flinching back. "I'm terribly sorry." Wonka finished and ducked behind the machine.

Violet's whole face was now blue; it spread to her neck and hands, so now she was able to actually see the problem. Violet frighteningly stared at her hand as it went down her wrist and to her fingers—everyone else saw her pale blond hair blotch into a deep blue.

"Mother; what's happening to me?" Violet asked; everyone backed up.

Violet looked down as her body began to bloat; her clothes were even turning the deep blue. Violet touched at her stomach as it grew; she looked around her as her whole body ballooned

"She's swelling up!" Grandpa Joe announced

Everyone stilled backed up as her stomach began to bubble through her top, "Like a blueberry." Charlie noted.

Violet face puffed as her body grew bigger and bigger; she touched at herself as she grew giant and round. Her arms, legs, and hands sunk into herself as she grew as tall as the ceiling. Wonka crept up behind Mrs. Beauregarde.

She jumped, "I've tried it on, like, twenty Oompa-Loompas, and each one ended up as a blueberry. It's just weird" He giggled.

"But I can't have a blueberry as a daughter—how is she supposed to compete?" Mrs. Beauregarde said; Wonka didn't seem to listen as she talked.

"You can put her in a county fair." Varuca added in curtly.

Mrs. Beauregarde glared as Wonka smiled; he looked over at Mrs. Beauregarde as if it was a good idea and it fixes everything. He frowned once he saw that she wasn't amused. Everyone looked off to the side as music began to play; they all looked to see Oompa-Loompas walk out from the smoke.

"Yeah, yeah." They started, walking towards Violet. "Yeah~!" Wonka started to shake to the music.

"Listen close, listen hard, the tale of Violet Beauregarde. This gentle girl she sees no wrong; chewing, chewing, chewing, chewing, chewing, chewing all day long." There were singing Oompa-Loompa's above her. Mrs. Beauregarde fumed to find them singing about her daughter.

"Chewing, chewing all day long; Chewing, chewing all day long. Chewing, chewing all day long. Yeah~." The Oompa-Loompas below began to roll her off; the ones above jumped on her and began to dance.

"She goes on chewing till at last; her chewing muscles grow so fast. From her face her giant chin; sticks out just like a violin, chewing, chewing all day long, chewing, chewing all day long. Chewing, chewing all day long. Oompa Loompa, Oompa Loompa, Oompa Loompa, Oompa Loompa. For years and years she chews away; her jaws get stronger every day." Violet began to scream as they rolled her.

"And with one great tremendous chew; they bite the poor girl's tongue in two, and that is why we try so hard, to save Miss Violet Beauregarde—chewing, chewing all day long; chewing, chewing all day long; chewing, chewing, chewing, chewing, chewing, chewing all day long. Chewing, chewing all day long. Chewing, chewing all day long." They pushed Violet passed the group as they finished their song.

"Mr. Wonka!" Violet cried out as they had gotten stuck in the door.

Wonka still danced; the song in his head. Mrs. Beauregarde walked beside him and glared; her eyes bulging. Wonka kept dancing until she caught his eye. He quickly straighten up and pulled a 'concerned' face.

"I want you to roll Miss Beauregarde into the boat. And take her along to the Juicing Room at once, okay?" Wonka told a stray Oompa-Loompa; who crossed his arms in understanding.

"'Juicing Room'? What are they gonna do to her there?" Her mother asked.

"They're gonna _squeeze_ her; like a little pimple." Wonka grinned, finding this whole situation amusing. "We gotta squeeze all that juice out of her immediately." Mrs. Beauregarde looked appalled.

She ran off to help her daughter as she slowly squeezed through the door. "Mother, help me! _Please_!" Violet called. Mrs. Beauregarde went up behind her daughter and gave her an awkward push; which helped them greatly.

Wonka turned to the group, feeling good with the little show, "Come on; let's boogie." Wonka said, taking them out of the invention room.

Wonka walked them down a hallway with silver metal walls; the first went down a huge spiral ramp. "Without the boat, we'll have to move double time to keep on schedule" Wonka told them. "There's far too much to see."

"Mr. Wonka?" Charlie asked.

"Yeah?" Wonka asked back, showing he was listening.

"Why did you decide to let people in?" Charlie asked.

"Well, so they could see the factory of course." Wonka passed.

"But why now? And why only five?" Charlie questioned more.

Wonka opened his mouth but Mike cut in, "What's the special prize at the end, and who get it?"

Wonka looked up for a second, "The best kind of prize; is a surprise, hah!" Veruca pushed in, leaving the adults to themselves, and walked next to Wonka.

"Would Violet always be a blueberry?" She asked.

"No." Wonka said certain, "Maybe… I don't know." Wonka gave up. "That's what you get for chewing gum all day; it's just disgusting." Wonka stated.

"If you hate gum so much; why do you make it?" Mike asked.

"Once again, you shouldn't mumble; it's starting to bum me out." Wonka passed.

"To make a profit?" Elice ask, Wonka looked down at her. "Like your contest…" She added and Wonka laughed.

"Oh dear girl, of course not…" Wonka laughed as if it was a silly statement.

Everyone walked in the pregnant silence; until Charlie took the pressure off, "Can you remember the first candy you ever ate?"

Wonka paused and gave a feeble smile, "No." He said, gazing off. Everyone stared as he just stood there. His faced cleared, "Sorry I was having a flashback."

"I see." Mr. Salt said; pulling his daughter back protectively

"These flashbacks happen often?" Mr. Teavee asked; shrinking back from him.

"Increasingly… _today_." Wonka smiled, continuing his walk. Everyone started to follow, keeping their distance.

The group came around a corner, "Ah, this is a room I know all about." Mr. Salt said, stopping them in front of a door called 'Nut Sorting room'. "You see, Mr. Wonka, I, myself, am in the nut business." Mr. Salt went into his suit pocket and pulled out a business card and gave it to Wonka. Wonka stared forward as he took the card and quickly chucked it behind him.

"Are you using the Havermax 4000 to do your sorting?" Mr. Salt asked.

"No." Wonka laughed, "You're really weird." Wonka said. Since interest was caught, Wonka went to open the door.

As they walked in, Veruca walked forward as they entered the blue and white spiral room. She walked closer to the gate and beamed as the ground floor had squirrels working on the nuts.

"Squir-rels." Veruca said, at lost for words.

"Yeah, squirrels." Wonka said, walking beside her. "These squirrels are specially trained to get the nuts out of shells." Wonka explained.

Mr. Salt turned to Wonka, "Why use squirrels? Why not Oompa-Loompa?" He questioned.

"Because only squirrels can get the whole walnut out almost every single time" Wonka answered. "See how they tap them with their knuckles to make sure it's not bad?" The group looked down at one of the squirrels to see him tapping on a nut a while longer than normal.

"Oh, look, look!" Wonka pointed to him as the squirrel placed the nut to its ear. "I think that one's got a bad nut." He said. The squirrel chucked it behind him and the nut rolled into the whole in the middle of the floor.

"Daddy, I want a squir-rel." Veruca demanded. "Get me one of those squir-rels; _I want one_."

Her father looked a little flustered, "Veruca, dear, you have many marvelous pets." Wonka smiled up at her father—as if proud of him for standing up.

"All I've got at home is; one pony, and two dogs, and four cats, and six bunny rabbits, and two parakeets, and three canaries and a green parrot, and a turtle, and a silly old _hamster_." Wonka gawked at her announcement of her zoo, "I want a _squir-rel_!" She shouted.

"All right, pet. Daddy will get you a squirrel as soon as he possibly can." Her father gave in; Wonka stared in amazement, his eyes wondered as he thought on the child.

"But I don't want any old squir-rel—I want a trained squir-rel." Veruca smiled.

Her father thought on it, a frown growing on his tired face, "Alright, very well… Mr. Wonka." Mr. Salt started; Wonka looked up and smiled as if he didn't hear the conversation.

"How much do you want for one of these squirrels?" Mr. Salt asked, using a professional approach "Name your price." He added to make the question more desirable; Veruca cheesed up at him as well, coating the cake with sugar.

"Oh, they're not for sell." Wonka smiled. "_She can't have one_." Wonka added, just for a little flavor.

Veruca's smile fell as she scowled and turned to her father, "Daddy." Her father looked a little nervous as he notices where this was going.

"I'm sorry, darling." Wonka mimicked, getting her attention. "Mr. Wonka's being unreasonable." He added, deepening his voice to sound more like her father.

Veruca glared and turn back to her father, "If you won't get me a squir-rel—I'll get one myself!" Veruca huffed, her father flinched, and she crawled through the gate—Wonka made no movement to stop her; they all watched as she climb down the stairs.

"Veruca." Her father called, trying to act calm.

"Little girl?" Wonka called out but she kept going.

Veruca ignored them and walked forward on the ground floor, "Veruca, come back here at once." Her father called, not raising his voice; she still didn't listen. "Veruca." He said slightly louder.

After a while of looking, she walked over to a patch of squirrel. As she drew near, each squirrel began to turn and stare at her. "Little girl." Wonka started, "Don't touch that squirrels nuts! It'll make him crazy." Wonka warned

In front of one squirrel, Veruca stared and thought for a second. "I'll have _you_." She cooed, reaching out for him. The squirrel cried out and charged at her.

She screeched as all the other squirrels jumped out at her, "Veruca!" Her father cried as he began to shake at the locked gate.

Frantically, he looked between her and the gate. He then looked at Wonka who looked down and pulled out a chain weighed down with millions of keys; Wonka's eyebrow rose.

"Veruca!" Mr. Salt cried out again as she began to back away from all the scrambling rodents.

She stopped as she notices she was going to be backed into the wall—all the squirrels jumped on her. "No!" She screamed and began to claw at the squirrels as they ran up her face.

She tripped and fell from the weight; "Veruca!" He father gasped, shaking the gate.

"Let's find that key…" Wonka mumbled as he 'searched' for the key. He pulled out one and put it into the hole; the key didn't fit. "Nope, not that one." Wonka said.

"Daddy!" Veruca called up as the squirrels scrambled around her body.

"Veruca!" Mr. Salt called out.

"Ah!" Wonka said, stuffing another key in, "Nope! Hah." Wonka laughed, but straighten as he saw that Mr. Salt wasn't laughing with him.

Vercua began to whimper as she tried to push the squirrels off; the squirrels managed to grab her hand and they pinned it onto the ground. Once they managed to get her other hand and both legs; Veruca's eyes widen at the situation. They went off to the side of her as they each sat on her limb.

"There it is." Wonka said as he went to place the key in the gate; it didn't fit, "There it isn't." Wonka said, retracting it back.

"Daddy, I want them to stop!" Veruca called up, frighten. Her father looked on hopelessly; not able to help this one.

One of the squirrels hopped on her chest and scooted closer to her head. It took hold of her temples to knock on her forehead; Veruca closed her eyes in fear as it placed its ear on her head to listen—as if it heard something, it flinched.

"What are they doing?" Charlie asked.

"Oh, they're testing to see if she's a bad nut." Wonka answered calmly.

The squirrel looked up at Wonka and squeaked, "My goodness, she is a bad nut after all." Wonka said.

The squirrels began to drag her body across the floor; moving closer to the middle hole. "Veruca!" Mr. Salt called.

"Daddy!" Veruca called back.

"Where are they taking her?" Mr. Salt asked.

"Where all the other bad nuts goes; to the garbage chute." Wonka said.

"Where does the chute go?" Mr. Salt asked.

"To the incinerator." Wonka said; a little too gleefully. Everyone turned to him concerned. "But don't worry; we only light it on Tuesdays." Wonka reassured.

"Today _is_ Tuesday." Mike told. Wonka glared down at him as Mr. Salt stared after his daughter frightfully.

"Well, there's always the chance they decided not to light it today." Wonka laughed nervously.

Veruca cried out as she drew closer to the hole. As the squirrels neared it; they then proceeded to push her down the hole—Veruca screaming the whole way down; her father joining her. All the squirrels then scrambled back to their post.

"Now, she may be stuck in the chute; just above the top. If that's the case, all you have to do is just reach in and pull her out. Okay?" Wonka said, Mr. Salt nodded.

Wonka face then turned serious as he twisted the key and opened the gate for Mr. Salt to exit. Everyone watched as he descended down the stairs; Elice watched as Wonka closed the gate and locked it. Mr. Salt waked off the first set of stairs and stopped—the Oompa-Loompas' music starting up. Oompa-Loompas in yellow jump suits walk out onto the floor and circled the hole as their music began.

"Veruca Salt, the little brute, has just gone down the garbage chute, and she will meet as she descends; a rather different set of friends, A rather different set of friends, a~ rather different set of friends~." They then begin to skip around it.

"A fish head, for example, cut; this morning from a halibut~." An Oompa-Loompa came with a fish bone, "An oyster from an oyster stew, A steak that no one else would chew," They chucked in an oyster shell and a burnt stake; Mr. Salt staring frightfully at the men.

"And lots of other things as well; each with its rather horrid smell, horrid smell~. These are Veruca's new found friends, that she will meet as she descends, these are Veruca's new found friends~." Mr. Salt began to walk down the stair case again, as he reached the bottom, they've made a pathway for him to walk through; Mr. Salt looked at each one as he passed.

"Who went and spoiled her, who indeed? Who pandered to her every need? Who turned her into such a brat? Who are the culprits, who did that? The guilty ones—know this is sad; are dear old mum-" And Oompa-Loompa tossed in a portrait of Mrs. Salt "-and loving-" Mr. Salt bent over to look into the whole; a squirrel ran in and pushed him down the whole, "-dad." Mr. Salt yelled all the way down.

Wonka covered his mouth 'shocked' at what the squirrel did. An Oompa-Loompa tugged at Wonka's jacket. Wonka bent down and the Oompa-Loompa whispered into his ear; catching everyone's attention.

"Oh, wow? Oh good." Wonka said as he stood and the Oompa-Loompa left. "I've just been informed that the incinerator's broken, so there should be about three weeks of rotten garbage to break their fall." Wonka grinned.

"Well, _that's_ good news." Mr. Teavee said sarcastically.

"Yeah… Well, let's keep on track." Wonka called as he walked forward.

Wonka took everyone down the hall way and stopped at an elevator. Pressing the button on the wall, it opened and everyone walked in. Something dawn on Elice as she felt like she remembered a certain elevator. Mike looked at the side to see a wall full of buttons

"There can't be _that_ many floors." He said as he looked them over.

Wonka looked down at him, "How do you know, Mr. Smartypants?" Wonka stared at all the buttons, "This isn't just an ordinary up and down elevator, by the way." Wonka stated.

"This elevator can go sideways, longways, slantways and any other ways you can think of." Wonka praised, turning towards them. Elice gasp and clasped onto Grandpa Joe; this was _the_ elevator. "You just press any button and—whoosh, you're off." Wonka said, pushing a button; without warning, the elevator took off to the right and everyone fell off balance.

The elevator popped out of its room and pushed down, then back over to the right. Mike looked at Charlie amazed, "Oh, look, look!" Wonka said, pointing forward as the elevator went through a hole.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to fudge mountain!" Wonka introduced.

There was a giant frosted brown mountain drawing closer to the elevator. The amazing part was that it looked as if they weren't even in the factory anymore! Oompa-Loompas worked on the mountains as they looked up and waved; Wonka waved back.

As the elevator past the mountain, it went into another round wall; the elevator was now back into the room looking factory. Still at a cruising pace, the elevator glided into a pink and black room, as they passed, Wonka perked.

"Oh!" Everyone looked at him and Wonka's face fell, "I'll rather not talk about this one." He said, laughing nervously. The group looked as a few Oompa-Loompas herd and sheared some pink sheep; collecting their pink wool.

The elevator moved them into a different room, this room all white. Everyone looked down to see nursing beds and Oompa-Loompas moving a few around. The bed held the burnt and battered puppet dolls Wonka had in the beginning.

"This is the puppet hospital and burn center." Wonka started, the group looked at him oddly, "It's… relatively new." Wonka smiled awkwardly.

Everyone, but Wonka, slammed into the elevator as it suddenly stopped and swooped down, "The administration offices." Wonka said as the elevator landed in front of a female Oompa-Loompa; typing up something unknown. "Hello, Doris." Wonka waved, she waved back.

The elevator jerked back, knocking all of its riders, and entered into a room where sparks and explosives flew at all sides. Everyone looked around confused as an Oompa-Loompa randomly shot fireworks in random places. Another loaded what looked like a peppermint ball, and fired it at a bull's-eye; not seeming to have any real rhyme or reason

"Why is everything here completely pointless?" Mike asked, annoyed.

"Candy doesn't have to have a point, that's why it's candy." Charlie said, Wonka smiled down at him softly.

"It's stupid!" Mike waved, bringing Wonka's happy cloud down. "Candy is a waste of time." Mike fumed and Wonka froze.

"It's only a waste to wasteful people." Elice said, glaring at him; he did basically _steal_ her winning ticket—and to act like this!

"Whatever." Mike said and the elevator grew quiet.

The elevator cruised down, not really going anywhere in particular. Mike turned to Wonka, who was staring off into space, "I wanna pick a room." Mike demanded, bored of all of this.

Wonka seemed to be in thought when a light bulb came, "Go ahead." Wonka smiled, though it held some unknown meaning.

Mike blinked, a little taken back that he'd allow him to actually choose. He turned to the wall full of buttons and searched until one caught his eye. 'Television Room' the button read; Mike made no hesitation to press it. The elevator suddenly stopped and pushed off to the left. Before the elevator even stopped, the doors opened to show a pure white room. Wonka stepped out first and rushed over to a pure white container; he reached in and pulled out these white 'sungoggles'.

"Everyone put these on; quick." Wonka instructed, placing his own on. "This light could burn your eyeballs right out of your skulls." Wonka told as everyone else grabbed and placed their goggles. "And we certainly don't want that, now, do we?" Wonka said, thought with all the happenings, no one really knew.

"This is the testing room for my latest and greatest invention." Wonka started, walking the group down the slop. "Television _Chocolate_." Wonka shined, "One day it occurred to me, heh; 'Hey, if television can break up a photograph into millions and millions of tiny pieces and send it whizzing through the air, and then reassemble it on the other end; why can't I do the same with chocolate? Why can't I, send a real piece of chocolate through the television; readied to be eaten?'" Wonka explained.

"I'm not gonna touch it; I'm not going in that direction."

Wonka looked over to see a stray Oompa-Loompa watching Oprah Winfrey in its own little white chair. The Oompa-Loompa turned the channel to several monkeys hopping in a stray wasteland.

"Sounds impossible." Mr. Teavee said.

"It _is_ impossible." Mike countered; Wonka turned at that, but decided not to argue, "You don't understand _anything_ about science!" Mike fumed; Wonka ignored him and stalked forward, but Mike wasn't going to let this go. "First off, there's a difference between _waves _and_ particles_—duh!" Mike and the group followed as Wonka took them up a ramp in the middle part of the room.

"Second, the amount of power it'll take to convert energy into matter would be, like, nine atomic _bombs_." Mike finished once they stopped.

"_Mumbler_!" Wonka shouted, right after he finished. Mike wasn't amused, and he didn't like the cheeky smile Wonka added at the end.

"Seriously—I can't understand a _single_ word you're saying." Wonka said, no trace of if he was kidding or not.

There was a pause as they both just stared at each other, Wonka turned from him, "Okie-dokie. I shall now send a bar of chocolate from one end of the room—" Wonka turned to the TV, "-to the other; by television." Wonka smiled, letting it sink in.

"Bring in the chocolate!" He called.

Six Oompa-Loompas came in carrying a pretty large chocolate bar; they brought it over to the middle of the room where a platter sat for it.

"It gotta be real big; 'cus you know how on TV you can film a regular size man, and he comes out looking this tall?" Wonka made a size with his fingers, "Same basic principles."

The stand began to rise and the chocolate lifted; it began to levitate and stand straight up. Lights flashed on as Oompa-Loompas in a gun packed chairs turned to face it. As the giant chocolate bar lifted higher, a glass casing came down on it. Everyone watched as the bar charged up and then—poof, it was gone.

"It's gone!" Charlie exclaimed, completely amazed.

Wonka looked down at him, "Told ya. That bar of Chocolate is now rushing through the air above our heads in a million tiny little pieces." Wonka said, wiggling his fingers.

"Come over here—come on, come on, come on!" Wonka said giddy. The group rushed over to the TV as they followed Wonka. He stopped in front of the TV as he bent down a little to see.

"Here it comes~." Wonka sung as a grayed rectangle appeared in the middle of the rocky terrains. "Oh, look." Wonka grinned; as if this was his first time at seeing this happen.

The gray rectangle fizzed and mesmerized into a Wonka bar; the monkeys went haywire as they jumped around it. "Take it." Wonka said, nudging Mike.

"It's just a picture on a screen." Mike said, not fooled.

Wonka tsked, "Scaredy-cat." He turned to Elice, "You take it." Elice blinked and stared at him for a second. "Go on." He pushed, "Just reach out and grab it." He told; it was that simple.

Elice looked at the screen nervously as she slowly scooted closer, "Go on." Wonka whispered. She reached her arm out and slowly touched for the TV.

Her arm went through the screen; Elice pursed her lips as she grabbed the Wonka bar—the monkeys screeched at her presence. Elice pulled the bar out and inspected it.

"Holy Buckets…" Grandpa Joe exclaimed.

Elice eyes bulge as she smiled up at Wonka, "Eat it Go on." He urged, Elice shrugged and looked down at it. "It'll be delicious; it's the same bar—it just got a little smaller on the journey, that's all." He said.

Elice ripped the top off and looked up at Wonka, who chomped his teeth in example, Elice smiled and took a small bite—she didn't want them to know she was chocolate crazy! She remembered to chew it slowly; Wonka waited as he stared at her.

"It's great!" Elice whispered, trying to contain herself.

"It's a miracle…" Grandpa Joe whispered.

Wonka smiled and stepped back some, "So imagine-" He stepped near the Oompa-Loompa and pointed at him, "-your sitting at home watching television, and suddenly a commercial will flash onto the screen, and it will say-" Wonka lifted his finger as he began to quote, "-'Wonka's chocolates is the best in the world. If you don't believe us; try one for yourself.' And you simply reach out and take it." Wonka grabbed out for emphasis. Wonka grinned and rocked back and forth, "How about that?"

"So, can you send other things? Say, like, breakfast cereals?" Mr. Teavee asked.

Wonka's face looked as if the mood of his was killed, "Do you have any idea what's in breakfast cereal?" Wonka asked, serious, "It's those curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners." Wonka wiggled his fingers in disgust.

"But could you send it by TV if you wanted to?" Charlie asked, helping them out. Elice nibbled the Wonka bar as they conversed.

"Of course I could." Wonka said curtly.

"What about people?" Charlie prompted, now more interested.

"Well, why would I want to send a person? They don't taste very good at all." Wonka asked, now confused.

"Don't you realize what you've invented? It's a teleporter!" Mike said excited. "It's the most important invention in the history of the world—" Wonka frowned and turned towards the Oompa-Loompa in the chair, they both shared a look, "And all you think about is _chocolate_." Mike sneered.

"Calm down Mike." Mr. Teavee said, turning towards his son, "_I think_ Mr. Wonka _knows_ what he's talking about."

"No he doesn't. He has no _idea_." Mike went on; everyone looked between themselves as they felt a conflict rising. "You think he's a genius—but he's an idiot!" He looked over at Wonka, "But I'm not."

Mike ran forward, jumping over the little Oompa-Loompa in the chair, but two others weren't as lucky as Mike charged through; slapping them both out of the way.

"Hey little boy." Wonka called. Mike ignored and climbed up the middle section, "Don't push my buttons." Wonka warned.

Mike continued as he knocked more innocent Oompa-Loompas over; the rest jumped out of the way, seeing his charging pattern. Mike climbed up the ledge and pushed off, tapping the red button in the process. He jumped of the ledge, and landed on the platform. Mr. Teavee ran forward as he realized the situation. The machine started as everyone walked forward.

The glass was lowering over Mike as his body began to rise. Wonka smiled as he looked on—that didn't go unnoticed by the weary Elice. Mike played around a little as he floated higher; he danced as he was suspended in air. Mike waved at everyone as the glass finally closed. The light flashed and Mike was gone.

"He's gone." Mr. Teavee whispered, watching on in amazement.

Wonka grin broaden as he tried to contain it, "Let's go check the television—see what we get." Wonka called, going back over to the TV. "I sure hope no part of him gets left behind." Wonka said concerned.

"What do you mean?" Mr. Teavee asked frantic.

"W-well, sometimes only half the little pieces find their way through." Wonka paused for a second and thought, "If you had to choose only one half of your son; which half would it be?" Wonka asked.

"What kind of a question is that?" Mr. Teavee asked, offended. Wonka's face fell.

"No need to snap… just a question." Wonka pouted. Wonka stood and turned to the Oompa-Loompa in the chair, "Try every channel, I'm starting to get anxious." Wonka waved when nothing appeared with the monkeys.

The Oompa-Loompa obeyed and pulled out a remote to change channels. As the TV flicked to another channel, music started to play and an Oompa-Loompa anchorman showed; with Mike looking around confused.

"There he is." Charlie said.

"Mike." His father called.

"The most important thing; that we've ever learned." The Oompa-Loompa began to surf through the channels, "The most important thing we've learned as far as children are concerned; is never, never let them near a television set, or better still just don't install the idiotic thing at all. Never, never let them. Never, never let them."

Mike stared confused as he flicked through all the channels, forced to get between all the shows. As Mike fell into a shower scene, he looked up to see the water start to turn on, but the Oompa-Loompa turned to a concert channel. The Oompa-Loompas outside the TV even started to dance.

"Never, never let them. Never, never let them. It rots the senses in the head, it kills imagination dead. It clogs and clutters up the mind, it makes a child so dull and blind; so dull! So dull! He can no longer understand; a fairytale, a fairyland—a fairyland, a fairyland. His brain becomes as soft as cheese, His thinking powers rust and freeze, He cannot think, he only sees~!" Mike was thrown into the air by the band; as he floated down, the rock concert turn into a 70s one. "Regarding little Mike Teavee, we very much regret that we—regret that we-"

Once on the ground, Mike appeared back in the shower scene. "-Shall simply have to wait and see—wait and see, wait and see." Mike flinched as an Oompa-Loompa pulled back the curtain and began to stab at him; he had to jump and dodge the teasing movements. The Oompa-Loompa flicked the channel to where he was abused in a few of them.

"We very much regret that we shall simply have to wait and see if we can get him back to size, but if we can't; it serves him right!" The anchorman finished; swatting him with his note cards.

"Ew." Wonka flinched, "Somebody grab him." He told.

"Help me!" Mike voice called as his father reached in; but it was so tiny due to his size. "Help me!"

Mr. Teavee pulled him out and held him between his index finger and thumb, "Thank god, he's completely unharmed." Wonka said 'concerned'.

Mr. Teavee turned quickly, "_Unharmed_? What are you talking about?" Mr. Teavee shouted, looking at his tiny son.

Wonka looked completely taken back by his tone; he looked down at the teensy Mike, "Just put me back in the other way!" Mike squeaked.

"There is no 'other way'. It's television, not telephone—_there's quite a difference_." Wonka mocked.

"And what exactly do you propose to do about it?" Mr. Teavee fumed.

Wonka paused and looked down in thought, "…I don't know." Wonka admitted. "But young men are extremely springy; they stretch like mad!" Wonka added, seeing Mr. Teavee's face.

Wonka looked about and then gasped, "Let's go put him in the taffy puller!" Wonka suggested excitedly.

"Taffy puller?" Mr. Teavee questioned, not believing what he just heard.

"Hey, that was my idea." Wonka said. Mr. Teavee froze as he stared at him; Wonka stared back awkwardly. "Boy is he gonna be skinny…" Wonka added, bringing the attention back to Mike. "_Yeah_~, taffy puller…" Wonka smiled nervously.

He turned towards the Oompa-Loompa in the chair, "I want you to take Mr. Teavee and his…—" Wonka looked at Mike and contemplated rather or not he was going to say something or not, "-_Little boy_ up to the taffy puller. Kay? Stretch him out." Wonka face brightens as he got it off his chest.

The Oompa-Loompa stood and walked over to Mr. Teavee, where he tugged on his pants leg, and lead him out of the room.

"On with the tour." Wonka said and led the small group out of the Television Room as it charged down.

Removing the goggles, Wonka lead them out of the room and into the little hallway where the elevator waited. "There's still so much to see. Now, how many children are left?" Wonka asked, turning around.

Elice and Charlie looked at each other, "Just two." Charlie said. Wonka looked at them both and seemed to think for a while.

"Oh… kay… Um, let's go to the Nerds room." Wonka looked a little flustered as he turned from the elevator and headed down the hallway.

"Mr. Wonka?" Elice asked, catching up to him before Charlie and his grandpa did.

"Huh?" He asked, not really looking at her.

"Um… Nothing." Elice mumbled, deciding to go against her thoughts.

"Okay?" Wonka mumbled.

"Charlie—Charlie." Grandpa Joe called.

"Yes grandpa?" Charlie asked, looking off as Wonka and Elice left.

"Charlie, we don't have much time left in this factory; and there's one room I really want to see." Grandpa Joe said, looking down the hallway after them.

"B-but grandpa… Wonka said that there was 'more to see', maybe he'll go to your room if you ask him?" Charlie said, a little uncertain about wondering off.

"Charlie, I really need to see this room; just for a second." Grandpa Joe told, urging him to follow into the elevator.

"What if we're left?" Charlie asked, but he ran into the elevator after his grandpa.

"He's going to the Nerds room. I'll know where it is." Grandpa Joe brushed, looking at the button wall. "Aha!" He cried out and pressed a button that read 'Fizzy Lifting Room'.

"Now here's a batch of them." Wonka said after he finished explaining to Elice why and how he created the Nerds. Through the whole tour of the room, Elice have been a little distant of Wonka—ever since the happenings with Mike actually.

Wonka walked over to a jar of colorful candy and poured them on the table. The Nerds popped up and began to hop around on the table; Elice jumped as they laughed and giggled—they even gasped when Wonka scooped a hand full up. He brought them over to her as he tried effortlessly to keep them in his hands.

"Try one." Wonka smiled, holding them out to her.

"Uh… no thank you Mr. Wonka." Elice said, holding her hand up in refusal.

"Huh? Why not." Wonka still grinned as he held it out to her, "Come on, try one." He blinked down at her innocently.

"I can't, I-I'm allergic." Elice lied and Wonka laughed.

Elice stared at him as he did his high pitch laugh that was awkward and sounded completely played and fake. She looked around nervously and began to laugh with him; Wonka calmed to a giggled and Elice completely stopped. Wonka suddenly stopped and quickly drew close to her face.

"No you're not." Wonka said softly, his violet eyes boring into hers. Elice gasped as his face was so close that their noses touched.

"Mr. Wonka?" Elice asked frighten, backing up. Elice kept going. she notice he moved in step with her.

"What's wrong, why don't you try one? It's delicious." Wonka said as he followed her each time she took a step.

"I'm fine, really." Elice lied; bumping into a cart of Nerds and knocking them over the floor, where they hopped around and giggled and laughed.

Wonka stopped and took a few steps back and tossed the Nerds down; he looked about and fixed his suit jacket. Clearing his throat, he finally looked her in the eyes.

"What are you doing, Mr. Wonka?" Elice asked, nervous.

"Congratulating you, of course." Wonka said, out of the blue.

"W-what?" Elice asked, a little weary.

"Yeah! Ha." Wonka laughed. Elice looked around to see Charlie and Grandpa Joe missing.

"Where are Charlie—and his grandpa?" Elice asked; really hoping the Oompa-Loompas didn't get them.

"Oh, don't worry about him, silly, you've won!" Wonka cheered and guided her out of the room.

"That was the contest…?" Elice whispered, her eyes wondered in thought.

"Yeah, I do congratulate you, I really do." Wonka grabbed her hand and began to shake it. "I'm absolutely delighted. I was a little uncertain in the beginning, but it all pulled out in the end. Well done." Wonka finished, still shaking her hand.

"Now we mustn't dilly or dally. Because we have an enormous number of things to do before the day's out—but lucky for us we have—"

"—Wait… Mr. Wonka… what?" Elice asked, not understanding his rambling.

"I'm giving you my entire factory." Wonka said, grinning from ear to ear.

"… What?" Elice asked, not believing what she was hearing.

"You seem confused, allow me to explain." Wonka started. "A month ago, I was having my semiannual haircut; and I had the strangest revelation." Wonka gazed off. "I looked down, and there it was. In that one silver hair I saw reflected my life's work; my factory, my beloved Oompa-Loompas—who would watch over them after I was gone?" Wonka gaze clouded, "At that moment I realized; 'I must find an heir'…" He then gazed down at Elice. "And I did, Elice—you."

"I invited fi-_six_ children to the factory, and whoever was the least rotten would be the winner; that's you Elice. So what do you say?" Wonka asked.

"What did you do with Charlie, Mr. Wonka?" Elice asked after a few seconds.

"What?" Wonka questioned, confused.

"I refuse." Elice said suddenly.

"W-what, what are you…?" Wonka laughed wearily, taken back.

"Charlie's not rotten, he's kind, and understanding, and really likes candy; he deserve it more, let him take over." Elice told, frowning up at him.

"Well, Charlie lost, so—you're the only one, heh." Wonka laughed her off, his face fell as he saw that she was serious. "Charlie _lost_." Wonka said, staring at her with a blank face.

"You did something to him…" Elice said slowly, "Like all the other children." Wonka looked at her offended.

"Did not." Wonka said childishly, "They did it all to themselves; I did nothing." Wonka told.

"Exactly the point." Elice said, "You did nothing to help them; you knew what would happen, and how to make them interested." Elice confessed her suspicions.

Wonka smiled as he thought on what she said, "Only to weed out the bad eggs." Wonka confessed.

"You're selfish, Mr. Wonka—you brought each kid here, knowing they were awful, and for what, entertainment?" Elice scolded.

"Selfish-?" Wonka repeated

"You hustle them." Elice said.

"_Hustled_?" Wonka asked, flabbergasted at her accusations.

"You enticed those children into falling for your trickery!" Elice said, frowning up at him.

Wonka's face was shadowed off by his hat as he looked down. He looked up and something flashed through his eyes; Wonka walked forward and Elice coward back—stopping Wonka's advancements.

"I don't want your factory—I want to go home." Elice said suddenly, Wonka opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

"… Oh, okay…" Wonka said, he looked stunned and confused.

Elice stood as an Oompa-Loompa walked over to her, she followed the little man to the door as Wonka still stood; she stopped at the door and glanced back, Wonka was still unmoving. Elice turned once she felt the tug on her school skirt, and walked out the office—soon out of the factory.

__

* * *

__

"Grandmama! I'm home." Elice called, running up the stairs.

Elice was back in America, to her dismay they used the elevator, but it was needed if she wanted to go back home. She was a little wary once she saw that the door was still open; the bottom lounge was freezing. Elice turned the corner in the hall and went into her grandmother's room; she paused when she saw her grandmother still in the spot she left her.

"G-… g-gandmama…?"

"I don't understand it…" Wonka mumbled, pacing back and forth in his office. "Me, _selfish_? I just allowed six kids and their p…-whatever into _my_ factory—two not even invited in the first place!" Wonka exclaimed

"Oh, and lets not mention that I make great candies and _share_ them all over the _world_!" he added.

The Oompa-Loompa's watched as the notice he was flustered. Wonka stopped and turned towards his computer screen, he picked up his cane and began to walk out of the room; the Oompa-Loompa didn't chime in as the watch him leave.

"Good boy, Charlie. From now on, we keep our feet on the ground. Come on; let's catch up to the others!" Grandpa Joe said and burped one last time.

Once they've exit the room, Charlie bumped into Wonka, who's back was turned as if he was walking down the hall way. "So much to do, so much to do, invoices and bills, letters . . . I must answer that note from the queen." Wonka mumbled.

"Oh!" Wonka said and turned around, "There you two are." Wonka smiled, looking at them both, they gave him worried looks but Wonka seemed oblivious to it.

Charlie looked around to see that Wonka was by himself, "Um… where's Elice." He asked, looking up at Wonka confused.

Wonka's eyes flashed slightly but then he just grinned, "Oh, she's gone." Was all Wonka said, which left Charlie and Grandpa Joe uneasy.

"Oh… well, Mr. Wonka, what's gonna happen to the other kids? Augustus, Veruca?" Charlie asked a little concerned, now that Elice might have met the fate as the other children.

"My dear boy, I promise you they'll be quite all right. When they leave here, they'll be completely restored to their normal, terrible old selves. But maybe they'll be a little bit wiser for the wear. Anyway, don't worry about them." Wonka said reassuringly, even though his voice was happy, he sounded quiet scornful.

"Eh, what do we do now, Mr. Wonka?" Grandpa Joe asked, a little relived that Wonka didn't seemed to notice their absence—or care.

"Oh, yes, well, I hope you enjoyed yourselves. Excuse me for not showing you out. Straight up the stairs. You'll find the way. I'm terribly busy. Whole day wasted. Goodbye to you both. Goodbye." Wonka said, checking his invisible watch again, he then walked a ways off and entered one of his many office door.

"What happened? Did we do something wrong?" Charlie asked.

"I don't know, Charlie. But I'm gonna find out." Grandpa Joe said, but he slightly had an idea; the two then entered the office.

Charlie and Grandpa Joe looked around quizzically as everything in the room was cut in half. "Mr. Wonka?" Grandpa Joe asked once he saw Wonka, amazingly, sitting down in half a chair, looking through papers that were also in half.

"I am extraordinarily busy, sir." Wonka said, not turning to look at him.

"I just wanted to ask about the prize; the special prize at the end, for Charlie. When does he get it?" Grandpa Joe started.

"He doesn't." Wonka said simply, still ignoring them.

"Why not?" Grandpa Joe asked, though he knew this was coming.

"Because he broke the rules." Wonka said reproachfully.

"What rules? We didn't see any rules, did we, Charlie?" Grandpa Joe countered, looking over to Charlie who stared on with guilt written on his forehead.

"Wrong, sir, wrong! Under Section Thirty-Seven B of the ticket obtain by him it states quite clearly-" Wonka pulled out a plaque golden ticket that was flipped on its front with the huge 'Wonka' sign, "-that all offers shall become null and void if—and you can read it for yourself in this photostatic copy: 'I, the undersigned, shall forfeit all rights, privileges, and licenses herein and herein contained, et cetera, et cetera . . . fax mentis incendium gloria culpum, et cetera, et cetera . . . memo bis punitor delicatum!' It's all there, black and white, clear as crystal!" Wonka mumbled the last in Latin.

"You stole Fizzy Lifting Drinks. You bumped into the ceiling which now has to be washed and sterilized, so you get nothing! You lose! Good day, sir!" Wonka said, twisting on his heel away from them.

"You're a crook! You're a cheat and a swindler!" Grandpa Joe fumed. Wonka's scowled slightly at the déjà vu, but didn't turn around. "That's what you are. How can you do a thing like this? Build up a little boy's hopes and then smash all his dreams to pieces. You're not the Willy Wonka I remembered—you're an inhuman monster!" Grandpa Joe reviles.

"I said Good Day!" Wonka clamored.

"Come on, Charlie, let's get out of here; Mr. Wonka could keep his prizes and chocolate—he's no heart left, blaming a small boy for something he was pressured in." Grandpa Joe mumbled, half apologizing to Charlie for getting him into this trouble.

Charlie didn't move as his Grandpa tried to usher him off, "Mr. Wonka…" Charlie started and walked over to his desk.

"Don't be angry at grandpa," Charlie started, he then looked up to Grandpa Joe, "it was me who wanted to go off the tour, I asked grandpa to take me to the fizzy drink." Charlie lied, he knew his grandpa admired Wonka, and didn't want Wonka to think badly of him. "If Elice is still in the building, then you should give the prize to her—since she was actually the _last_."

"So shines a good deed in a weary world. Charlie… my boy… You won!" Wonka turned quickly, causing Charlie and his grandpa to jump. "You did it! You did it! I knew there was something; I just knew it was. Oh, Charlie, forgive me for putting you through this. Please, forgive me." Wonka said grabbing Charlies hand and shaking it fervently.

"Wha-?" Grandpa Joe fumbled.

Wonka smile broaden as he looked down at Charlie; Wonka chose five children who could excel as his heir—Augustus with his great taste and love of chocolate; Violet with her uncanny confidence and strong will to compete; Veruca with her business experience and her cunning wit to gain what she wanted; Ethan for his mechanical abilities and great money strategies; and Elice for her artistic abilities and her caring for living things.

Each great things to be leaders of his factory, but also their downfall; Augustus was way too greedy that his love for chocolate would harm the factory more than advance it; Violet was too competitive, attitudes like that would spoiled the flavor more then produce more business; Veruca was too spoiled, she'd only hog the factory's candies for herself; Ethan was far too interested in money, another attribute that would spoiled the flavor; Elice was… well, she was too live friendly, when Wonka made candies, he brought them to life—something the must have brushed her the wrong way. Plus Elice was a silly name; Elice and the chocolate factory—'_Nervada_ bars'? That just won't do.

Willy shook his head as he notice his mind straying. Mike and Charlie, he didn't really know anything about the boys, since he didn't pick them in the first place. Wonka was more then happy when Mike found something of interested; it made it a lot easier to be placed in trouble when you were in a room with things you couldn't say no to. He's thought Charlie was just like the others rotten kids who meddled in things they weren't supposed to; but come to find it was his Grandpa who wanted to explore a favorite part his factory once again.

Wonka urshed the two out of his office and led his new protégé to his waiting elevator.

_**

* * *

**_

**Author Note:** Okay first off, the thing that bothered me about the last part. You might have notice a change of mood during the end, but that's because I went for the Mel Stuart ending—don't worry though, it picked up to when Willy (Johnny Depp) Took them to their home (with the whole family thing, to the shoe shine, to the father thing, then the 'move the little house inside the lovely chocolate room' parts.) I just decided to skip it seeing as we all seen the move, and if you haven't; then I apologize for ruining such a great movie for you, and also for how much of a loser you are.

If you don't understand, or didn't really see how anything had to do with anything; Ethan was pretty cheap, though he was kind of poor, he valued money—a lot. Elice is a, well for lack of a better word, pacifist. If you hadn't caught on with the little hints I dropped of her not liking the candies that came to life (or the 'whipped' cream). Anyways, she didn't really do anything to express her artistic abilities—not having the chance and all— but Wonka had read up on her so…

I know; 'it means something is wrong when you have to explain your idea in your story', but I felt that the story played exactly how I wanted it. I couldn't see myself telling you any more then that without turning the first few chapters into a guide book—A story can't just _say_ the twist as it turns—but an author note can. If you caught onto my idea from the beginning, congratulations, if not; then I'm sorry, I didn't want to make a story like 'Willy brought five kids to his factory, when in reality, the only one he saw good enough was Charlie; but he allowed them to finish the tour anyways—stopping at certain places purposely that would knock off certain bad kids.'. No, that would be lame.

So sorry I make long notes, I just feel like I had to explain myself for how I pictured the WWATCF/CATCF. But if you already understood my messages then you don't have to read the note (yeah, I put this all the way after the whole thing—you're probably pissed, right?)


End file.
